:::dRESSLAb:::

redirection of blog

2007-08-30T12:43:00.000+08:00

for those of u who are interested in my daily musings...please visit our (Redz and me) joint blog...

www.dreamsindigital.multiply.com

have a nice day!

me on our solemnisation

2007-07-21T01:10:00.001+08:00

WE ARE MARRIED!!!!!

2007-06-15T16:11:00.000+08:00

02062007 our ROMM date. we are officially husband and wife. just waiting for reception on 17062007. its gonna be a real splendour for me....us....with the chocalate cupcakes and chocolate fountain....mmmm yummy slurps...slurps...all of u gotta be there k...

luv u guys...

resurrection

2007-05-06T19:35:00.000+08:00

wow....its been 2 months since i last posted anything here...

what have i been up to? well, for a kick-start, i have a seriously overwhelming agenda this year. MY BIG DAY!
Yes, 17th June....Our long awaited wedding...

last sat, 5th of may, we had gone for the interview at ROMM (Registry of Muslim Marriages) with my dad. Dad told us abt the few experiences he had at the old ROMM during his young days for the marriages of his siblings. right aft that we met helmi & nina, the celebrity siblings who are working in the same company as hunny. they had to perform photo shoots for the 3 eligible bachelors for their magazines. hunny, nina, helmi and i were not very impressed with them. not only they came 1 hour too late, but they were very stiff and difficult to direct on how to pose for the magazines. hhhmmm....sumthing for me to ponder, how would hunny and i be for our wedding photoshoot?

then, later in the evening, hunny, his brothers and i watched spiderman 3 for the second time...hunny's dad got the tickets from his company and we got to watch the second one at no cost at all.....what a day..but i enjoyed my day spent with that kinda exciting agenda...with hunny gonna be my husband, my life is totally complete. hunny had been working hard all these while all for his family, for me...for us. that's what i look for in a husband, to care alot for his loved ones. simply can't wait to be wed...

double happiness

2007-03-05T15:50:00.000+08:00

remember the entry about the 'newlyweds' dated 17th december 2006? well, hunny and i have been yearning to hangout with the 2 married couples to catch up after losing contact for quite awhile. i had this urge to text dian & zam asking how they were doing after the matrimonies last year. firstly, i texted dian. i teased her and asked when is the 'new person' in the family gonna be due...thinking they may not be planning to have kids at this moment.
lilltle that i know she is 2 months preggie! wow....that's really wonderful...i'm so elated to hear that...swiftly, i forwarded the news to hunny. he was as astonished as i was..

the very next second i texted zam and teased her with the same question...my heart was throbbing awaiting for the brilliant news....standing next to the traffic light enthralled, i was astounded yet again with another great news....zam is in her 3 months now....that very moment i texted hunny again and told him i wanted to meet these 2 mummies-to-be....dian said she missed us too....i earnestly wanted to organise a confluence of 3 wonderful couples to share our moments of being solemnised as legally wedded husbands and wives...i mean, hunny and i would have to go through that before we knew it.

so, vivo would be the place to dine and the plan is to crossover to sentosa and chillout at cafe del mar for our weekend extravangance. i really couldn't wait to embrace the 2 wonderful ladies....had known them for 5 to 6 years now? for all i know, they have become part of my life....and hunny's...

so, i'm definitely looking forward to this weekend. to celebrate the double happiness...

//...nuthing can be compared to a weekend with our luv ones...///

50 days old ryan ardiansyah

2007-02-28T11:27:00.000+08:00

sue's & din's first offspring....what a cutie charmer!!

isn't he adorable? mmmm....melts.......such good looking baby...

counting down the days to the wedding

2007-02-23T11:56:00.001+08:00

four more months to go....

leggings fad

2007-02-12T11:14:00.001+08:00

hunny has been so nauseated by the leggings fad. he loathed especially those who do not really know what they were putting on themselves. though the long tuniques looked horribly disgusting on them, they thought it's fashionable. eeewww...c'mon!!!

i had told him last year it was becoming just a crazy fad. being in the fashion industry, the foremost style information is in our hands. advanced foresight on what's coming into the season or out of the season is our forte. not blowing my own trumpet, but most people around me says and knows that i have my own identity. never would i wear leggings just because everyone else is wearing it. they blatantly follow just about everyone else!

another heinous, atrocious mass fashion accessory is the thick waist belt fad. its not only competing with the WWF accessories on their torso, but also the traditional japanese with their kimonos. wear it the wrong way, you look like a comedian yourself. where are those days where everyone is unique? i know i am. hunny is proud of me and my innovations. always differ and stand out from the crowd. even sharon as the main buyer of our store announced so. unique as in the way i dress and portray my identity. play around with garments and create mileage to a simple tank or printed camisole or a long sleeve snug pullover.

how do i wear them? no...i do not wear them, i created and experimented them by adding mileage to what has already been unique....in fact ive done my very own flower corsages, accessories like earrings, chokers and rings...not forgetting ribbon belts and many others wonderful creations i hand sewn beads, sequins, ribbons and pearls on laces. viv de couture. hhhmmm...my very own collection...absolutely marvellous! splendid! much as i desire to start the business with eza, i do not have the time and materials at this very mmoment. as 100% of my energy is spent on my wedding plans. lots of work to do on my very own event. once in my whole lifetime.

so, meanwhile i am on my way to wear my own wedding gown. it's been such a long wait. worthwhile. we are extremely excited to be staying together as husband and wife. hhhmmmm.........honeymoon? to be confirmed....

///...wish me luck on my event planning...///

the time of my life

2007-02-05T10:24:00.000+08:00

|| la senza ||

we had been shopping for apparels all over the city. hunny wanted to redeem the $30 nike voucher which he got from his dad. so, on saturday which happened to be our offdays, we went to vivocity, millenia walk, and then suntec city. he was ecstatic and beaming with his shopping, while i was still sullen as i had not really gotten anything yet at that moment the nike dri-fit brown zipper cardi was nowhere to be found. it was the most stylish nike apparel i ever saw, really snug and chic on me. the nike swosh was in metallic champagne gold. it was only like a hundred bucks. hunny said i could wear that for clubbing.

hence, hunny had a bright idea. he took me to 'la senza' lingerie boutique at suntec city. that subsided my gloominess. he was buying me some nice lingerie sets from there....i was eated when i tried them on. they had me feel so sexy and snug me to the skin. i luv all three of the bras! they are so luvly i asked hunny if i could have them all. he said, whatever that make me happy...he shall pay them for me. i luv my baybee! one of them was a turquoise sweetheart shape, another was a beige spring printed half cup and last but not least was a green palm printed half cup bra. definitely i had all the matching undies...hehee...all different styles. thong for the turquoise, boy briefs for the beige and g-string for the green....i am feeling so much more sexier in them...thanks to my luvly fiance...he was beginning to feel good about the retail therapy thingy. we had our 'rendezvous' to pamper ourselves yet again...

|| birthdays ||

last saturday was niza's birthday. today is mummy's birthday...but she had the celebration party at kimsia last night..all the staff came after work and i was the second batch group (hunny, me & ila). hunny took a cab and fetched me from paragon as i was carrying 6 baguettes and 2 aluminium trays for mummy.

we reached kimsia at 8.20pm and i saw there were only sherrrie and sha. as for the rest were all the friends, family or relatives, whom i have met before too...all the familiar faces. hunny and i got takashimaya vouchers for mummy. we were glad we had her something which she could use to buy all the things that she want from there.

|| superstar ||

so, we had dinner. bufffet was terrific, and i literally swallowed tonnes of 'ondeh-ondeh' sha had prepared for mummy....the usual 'clan' were sitting at the corridor while the boys were watching soccer...after singapore's victory battling with thailand, we watched the result for the superstar from channel u. Darren Tan was the winner. he is hunny's buddy from soccer when he was in school. hunny and i had aniticipated he will be the next superstar. he has the charisma and is very cute too...i like his dimples. hunny teared when darren was mentioning about his family and broke down. his talent is conspicuous. we are so proud of him. my colleagues even bet with another party that he would win. true enuf....hunny wanted to meet him this weekend. he sms darren, to catch up and congratulate him. nice guy....

|| honeymoon ||

we had our weekend anniversary honeymoon. hunny has been pampering me and treating me like his queen. whenever i amcraving to eat something, he bought for me. whenever i felt down, he paid for my retail therapy. whenever i needed a hug, he embraced me like a baby...gave me the warmth that i need...we are so luvin and the bond getting even much sturdier. i am not only his wife...he said, i am his best friend, his baybee, his lover, and his lifetime partner.

//...elated...that is what i am feeling right now...//

12th anniversary...

2007-01-31T19:26:00.000+08:00

tomorrow marks our anniversary

and hunny has his own friendster account!

check out what his profile is...

Volatile at best - Handle with care. Enjoying the BEST TIME of my life right now. Holding the bestest, mostest perfecto job doing 2 things i LOVE doing the most, design & sports. (To do the things you love doing and getting so much out of them, there are days when you wake up wondering, could your life be this good if you had chosen another path, be with another partner? I doubt so. I might never have gotten the same support as i got from my fiance and wife-to-be, my lurvly Vivi.) Sorry, i got carried away on that. I'm stubborn. That's how i achieved what i got today. Love it or hate it, this is me.
:snatchcase - redux '78, apocalectro, verse 69, line 13.
Who He Wants to Meet:
Friends i've lost touch with, old school friends, new friends with same interests, friends of friends of friends. And i wanna meet my wife, if we are not so busy with work. Oh, Karen O from the yeah yeah yeahs.

enjoy!

new years's blessing

2007-01-22T14:11:00.000+08:00

last year had been a great year for the both of us...hun and me....

however, this year so far has been thousand times better....tonnes....loads....

we have been shopping even on the early december, lots.....although we do save a fraction of our earnings at the same time in another bank account....i have gotten 2 pairs of nike footwear from hunny...one black yoga trainers for work, very stylish...very comfy...and nike free, white with red and grey lines on em, minimalist...just like prada...for running or casual day out. both from hunny. i lurve them to death!!!

ive got also some really nice pullovers and tops, a new ALDO wallet, in creme...gstar black jeans, Armani jacket, a pair of wedges (first one by the way! lol). i was walking and dancing fine in em as its not like any normal wedges, its vertically thin wedge in denim and covered toes. it matched a retro printed long sleeves woolen dress (which i bought at the brink of time to wear on the cruise for our company's dinner on dec 29th 2006). other than that i've gotten myself the marithe francois girbaud jeans which i've been itching to get from my workplace for ages....finally...tops? oh, u tell me...agnes b, what else? mmm....i have been all smiles...

well, as for hunny...he had bought himself the whole store of nike...hahaha! he's gotten a nike free too, in grey and white combination. socks to match, shorts, tees (let me see, how many tees? 6? 8? lost count...) not forgetting a mambo backpack for his ibook (our ibaby now)...from i21 at orchard cineleisure.

we went berserk shoppin for stuffs....haha...

well, more shopping to do for our dowry gifts next mth onwards....gotta get prepared from now...

class dedications

2006-12-25T12:44:00.000+08:00

as i was reading up more on the wedding magazines, i had this urge to send dedications on class 95 so i sms yaz, the DJ....it was impromptu...just after hunny expressed his desire to become my lawful husband....i was elated and it leads to this...

"goin out to my luv, Redz..I can't wait to be your wifey too...it's amazing how we withstood 11yrs worth of roller coaster in this relationship. a decade had past, many more decades from now n till i breathe my last, i will luv always..."

Yaz replied...
Hey Viv..read your dedications earlier on Love Songs! Hope you guys enjoyed the song! :) Yaz

hunny thanked the deejay for giving us hope & luck..many more years of luv

to our astonishment, then came this song...

we were feeling nostalgic cos that was the first song hunny dedicated and sang to me when we first fought after a few months of dating...from boyz to men..that was a decade ago...

On Bended Knee

Darlin' I can't explain
Where did we lose our way
Girl it's drivin' me insane
And I know I just need one more chance
To prove my love to you
If you come back to me
I'll guarantee
That I'll never let you go

Can we go back to the days our love was strong
Can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong
Can somebody tell me how you get things back
The way they use to be
Oh God give me a reason
I'm down on bended knee

I'll never walk again until you come back to me
I'm down on bended knee

So many nights I dream of you
Holding my pillow tight
I know I don't need to be alone
When I open up my eyes
To face reality
Every moment without you
It seems like eternity
I'm begging you, begging you come back to me

Can we go back to the days our love was strong
Can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong
Can somebody tell me how you get things back
The way they use to be
Oh God give me a reason
I'm down on bended knee
I'll never walk again until you come back to me
I'm down on bended knee

Gonna swallow my pride
Say I'm sorry
Stop pointing fingers the blame is on me
I want a new life
And I want it with you
If you feel the same
Don't ever let it go
You gotta believe in the spirit of love
It can heal all things
We won't hurt any more
No I don't believe our love's terminal
I'm down on my knees begging you please
Come home

Can we go back to the days our love was strong
Can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong
Can somebody tell me how you get things back
The way they use to be
Oh God give me a reason

I'm down on bended knee
I'll never walk again until you come back to me
I'm down on bended knee

Wanna build a new life
Just you and me
Gonna make you my wife
Raise a family

newly weds

2006-12-17T18:16:00.000+08:00

all the best to the newly weds

||...nasrul & dian....and nazhan & zam...||...17th december 2006...||

the luv of my life crashed at my place on friday nite after our movie date with jd and sharon which ended at 3am. we were chilling out at my place the whole day until 7pm. hunny and i managed to attend nasrul's and dian's wedding last nite at jurong east. the objective of goin there was to just watch how happy they were on the stage. the settings, it was impeccably spectacular..impressive...with the chandelier lights on the stage and structural metal frames coiled with flowers....i was amazed with dian looking so gorgeous, stunning and composed in her white bridal gown.

one of the event that moved me to tears was when nas gave a speech on how dian had made his life complete. and dian had also expressed how lucky she was to be his wife. an emotional moment hit my senses...my face was burning red...my eyes were welling up a bucket of tears...my body felt weak. gracefully, hunny turned to me and held me close to him, feeling my sentiments. he understood how it might have affected me in a way that i would be exactly in the same position as dian. hunny told me he couldn't wait to be my hubby. we have to plan carefully what we wanna say for our speech, wedding vows. it would have to be a seperate wedding reception from the relatives'. hunny and i are planning to throw a dinner with our close friends which would be by the beach and everyone can be casually clad or even dress up if they desire to. it would be one of the best wedding event of the year, i hope...

close up?

2006-12-14T20:41:00.000+08:00

as i was trying to check on my profiles on which looks better, i had these few shots taken of me...hehe...

i guess this is the best shot, with me in my vintage denim motorcycle jacket....lookin serious yet candid?

that was taken at the vivocity washroom when i met hunny last friday. we were so amazed by the humungous size of vivo. hunny is planning to take me there for new year's eve to chill out. and celebrate our anniversary on the 1st.

we are left with 6 more months before the wedding bells ...the nearer we are towards the new year, the anxious i become....hunny told me he couldn't wait to be my hubby....

our haven, our abode

2006-11-22T19:18:00.000+08:00

after our wedding, hunny is staying with my family for awhile before we purchase our own flat, our haven. well, he is my family soon. so, for now we are planning for an overhaul makeover for my room...our room. it's gotta be tech & fashion savvy, with LCD TV monitor and xbox 360. all white & black...while our lounge area will be near the window.

our private chamber is gonna be the best we could ever ask for...the cosy atmosphere for us to look forward to after a long day at work...hhhmmm....our haven....

//...more planning to do..//

too soon?

2006-11-11T20:55:00.000+08:00

yesterday hunny and i finally visited each other's parents for hari raya. i had planned for us to do that on the first day but unfortunately hunny was asked to move from places to places by his parents. he had to go to the elders' families. priority. then the next day he had to serve the nation. huh! well....after 2 weeks, we then went out in our traditional outfits to our future in-laws. for the first time in donkey years i tried to apply some cosmetics which i 'stole' from my sis' room...hunny said i looked fine...the blusher was just nice....boy! i was a pro! hehees...

so from my place, we reached his place at about 8pm. it was a real long bus journey. upon stepping into his flat, i had to excuse myself to the washroom while waiting for his mum to end her 'maghrib' prayers. i had butterflies fliiping their wings in my stomach. then, his mum came out and i kissed her hand and she gave me a hug. it felt so warm and luvin. she served me drinks and some 'murtabak' and hunny sat next to me so we ate together.

after dinner, hun's mum and dad had a discussion with us. they had wanted our wedding to be in june next year. my heart was racing and the blood in my veins was rushing up. i was stunned. overwhelmed. in a few seconds i heart my heart pounding even louder as if it almost popped out of my chest.....i thought to myself, "isn't it too soon?" his dad could see my facial expressions of surprise. and i told them hunny and i had planned in december instead.

hun's mum told us to hasten the good stuff as it is also for our own good. i had told hunny that we would choose our own date cos it's also already almost a year we are engaged by then. i was having mixed feelings....nerve wrecking as well as overjoyed. i thought i would have more time to do the preparations but hunny had agreed with them to hold the wedding in june. hhhmmm....i guess i am just still a little contented with the way we are now....but now that we had already planned ahead on the logistics and the financial part, i wouldn't have to worry so much. i guess i have to keep a close eye on our monthly budget. for our household, our gifts and all that's neccessary...especially my costumes.

to all my friends who hadn't heard from me for ages, just hang in there for my invitations yeah?

//...my wedding planner had come in handy after all...//

my baybee is back!!

2006-11-04T13:56:00.000+08:00

hunny was back from reservist this morning. he went back home to sleep before meeting me later at about 4pm or 5pm. i am so glad it was my off day too. cos he had planned sumthing for us today....yippeee!!!!!

i suppose its not that bad that we didn't meet for days...stimulates the emotions of yearning for one another....mmm...i luv my baybee!!!

//...will be back for more details on our date...//

days of my life - part ii

2006-10-30T15:53:00.000+08:00

----------------------------
saturday 21st october 2006

i was off...we stayed out on the friday nite and on saturday afternoon we went back to hunny's place. he asked me to change out to his tee so i would look more 'appropriate' and conservative when broke our fast together with his family...so i did, as it was also fasting month cos i did not expect to meet his parents that day. initially we had wanted to meet nazya and the plan was cancelled much later...

then at about 4pm we left his place for sim lim by cab to check out on the repair of his laptop. whether or not it could be salvaged...though we anticipated the probability is almost zero. true enough, it was not worth the repair so he had to trade it off at one of the laptop store there at sim lim. it was worth 80 bucks...it was an old pentium iii and the harddisk was not even sufficient to upload pictures.

then we looked around for my laptop charger adapter as the current one was not the exact adapter compared to the original.

we left sim lim at about 6.55pm and it was time to break our fast. so we took a cab back to hunny's place. as soon as we reached hun's residence, his mum asked if we had consume anything yet. i answered "we had not broken the fast yet"....so she prepared dinner for us and i stayed there till his mum had finished her prayers.

hunny and i felt like having 'indian cuisine' and we rushed down to the nearest indian stall within the vicinity of his place. we ordered 'mee kuah' (red gravy noodles) for him and 'beef steak kuah' (beef steak with red gravy) for me. it was filling and satisfying i could barely move from there. at bout 9.30pm, i took the bus to the mrt station and headed home. it was not a very pleasant day actually as hunny was having his mood swings and it affected me too...i was being submissive for once. however, before going home...i told him i was very upset with the way he handled the situation....

hunny was apologetic....to redeem himself, hunny passed the ipod for me to listen to his music complilations during my journey home....it was a nice ride home alone...

---------------------------
sunday 22nd october 2006

hunny dropped by scotts to look for me. i had his charger for the laptop he traded in and my old laptop charger adapter sample for him...as he was holding my laptop now....for his projects...

we did not meet that day and i thought that would be a good break for us to take a moment to be by ourselves as his mood swings are on a 'yo-yo'.....i would rather keep our distance than to argue with him and eventually both of us would continue getting infuriated with one another.

yaya texted me to ask me to go for hari raya outing on 12th november, sunday. i told her i couldn't promise as i have to work on that day. but she insisted i take MC just so we would go out as a group the whole day. much as i want to, i just had to take half the day off or sumthin cos i have too much responsibilities than to play 'truant'.

----------------------------
monday 23rd october 2006

its Dawn's birthday! i texted her at about 12.30am to wish this gorgeous lady a smashing good time on her special day....i hope she would be attached soon....i asked hunny if he would be meeting her to celebrate with her...hunny said he had too much stuffs to do at home and that the project on the websites do not allow him to go anywhere at all. well, at least he's being responsible now...he had set his priorities right since the day he started working full time early this year.

i was pre-occupied myself too...had to prepare the house with the gold lace curtains..(gosh those curtains do challenge my tolerance level!) and spring clean the living room as well as my room. nuthing much to clean though as i maintained the cleanliness and organise my room pretty well...and changed out the cushion covers for the couches in the living room. after which i used the magic kleen dust buster to keep the floor in my room spotless. usually my aunts and uncles would be performing their prayers in my room as it is the most spacious and appropriate one...

as i was cleaning, hunny texted me some really moving messages...he remembered last year where he was, what he was doing on the eve of 'hari raya'...during that period he left home during the fasting season for almost 2 months...i was his only family and the first day of syawal month i brought him the festive dishes from my home. he was renting out a room near my block last year...and to listen to 'takbir' just made him sappy and brought him tears. he was as regretful...i thanked HIM that he is now back with his family at home. i had to penetrate when it concerned his family ties..i told him it was a bad move....whatever he did last couple of years....he agreed entirely.

my message to hunny:

"my dearest fiance..i would like to take this opportunity to ask forgiveness from you for everything that i've done to irritate or hurt your feelings...whether it was intentionally, subcounsciously or unintentionally. as this year we are celebrating this season of eid mubarak together i hope its gonna be a beutiful one for us. Insya-Allah (if God permits) in a couple of years we would be celebrating this season as hubby & wifey. we shall meet tmr for the last time before you go thru the episode of being away from home n me. luv you so much hunny..."

hunny's message to me:

"i would like to apologise too, for my tempers, my mood swings, my foul mouth, and all the bad things. this is our first year celebrating as a special couple. i wanna make the days to come very special for you, for us. i hope we'll be stronger than ever. that our dreams will not be just dreams."

---------------------------
tuesday 24th october 2006

"Salam Aidilfitri".....to all who celebrate this season...."Happy Eid".

it was a big day for all muslims.....

i did not sleep a wink...my mum as usual had to cook for all the guests who came visiting on the first day...my parents are the eldest in the family on both sides...so, its always the same thing every year....the session of 'seeking forgiveness' from one another...tears and joys...all happening here at my residence....

i dressed up in my own created hari raya outfit...trendy, as my boss and sharon called it...(the top was a bi-tonal orange of 4 or 5 years ago and the bottom was a matt gold of 2 years ago that i put together. to make it look more trendy i wrapped a gold tulle around my waist, ruched it on one side and created 2 rosettes on the other side of my waist....that attracted the attention of many passers-by...

before heading to my gran's on my mum's side...lid (my 4th sis) tagged along to help me carry the dishes as ive promised my colleagues i would be providing them lunch that day. my lady boss asked me to wait for a moment as she prepared 'ang pow' for formality. lid got that too...

sharon commented..."wow! nice outfits...did you do that yourself?" i looked really different and yea, i admitted it was my idea..the whole outfit ensemble. even my lady boss was impressed..a while later, mummy came also to pass me another 'ang pow' (red packet) ....
as i was waiting, i fidgeted and was restless as the heels that i was on was the 2nd time being worn by me. it had pretty lacey straps on the front and has got ankle straps...three inches high & matt gold to match my whole outfit...i could barely walk...but i tried to move gracefully as we just need to flag a cab to my gran's.

as soon as we got home at about 1.30pm...i had a slump. i told my sisters, who had at least a few hours of sleep the nite before, to entertain any visitors while i took my well deserved sleep. so i did for a few hours....i couldn't even leave my room for awhile until it was time for the important guests....my close uncles and aunts...i managed to rise at about 4.30pm.

Gosh, that was exhausting! the visiting ended at 1am...

-------------------------------
wednesday 25th october 2006

hunny had to start his reservist. he said he luvs me before he left. our undoubted luv has grown even sturdier....

hunny was actually very glad he did not have to stay home during this period as he hate to entertain guests...he wished we would have our own house by now so that we will only be concentrating on one another and our business venture. no fuss over the visitings.

i managed to call eza on her aussie mobile and she was elated as soon as she heard it was me who wished her 'selamat hari raya' yestrday. reto was there to celebrate with her...well, she wasn't alone and miserable after all....

i am happy she's happy....

-----------------------------
thursday 26th october 2006

meetings again.....higher hierarchy comes with more responsibilities...i could accept that fact. though i felt really overloaded at times. hunny wants to quickly start the multimedia business so that he could support me soon. he has always wanted me to get a job that i won't have to struggle between the stress and my emotions. he wants to be the best hubby to me...as much as i want to be the best companion besides a wife to him.

-------------------------
friday 27th october 2006

whoppiee!!!! it was my off day...and i had super duper nice sleeping hours that had been long awaited. hunny messaged me in the afternoon from the reservist camp and asked what i was doing. i had started reading the novels we bought from carrefour and i got hooked on reading more....it was a very meaningful off day though i was home alone most of the time. reading kept me occuppied. "Dead Aim" by Iris Johansen was what i started with....now i am comin to the end of the whole story and i have 3 more other novels to continue.

----------------------------
saturday 28th october 2006

hunny booked out at 7pm and he fetched me from work at paragon. JD was with him and hunny gave me a long awaited osculation on my cheeks....it sent shudders down my body system...not that i was nervous or fearful but its a nice sensation i won't want to let go...i yearn for that kind of intimacy......yet again..

we then had dinner at cafe cartel. while the boys watched footie, i read dead aim. it was so addictive. then we decided to go to the 9th floor of the orchard cineleisure so the boys could continue their entertainment....xbox on FIFA. i watched them play...gladly..as long as hunny was by my side.

it was almost 11pm that sharon showed up after her dinner and we wanted to go for movies. after much negotiation...we decided to play monopoly at kimsia instead. sharon served us booze and we had our 'fun' til about 3.30am. it was my first time after donkey years of playing board games but i wasn't that bad according to sharon and JD. hunny lost out eventually....we totally enjooyed that nite...

//...it was a great story...i suppose?...//

the perishers...when i fall

2006-10-22T20:13:00.000+08:00

I thought you should know
I don´t wanna let go
Since you´re allt I´ve ever dreamed of
What will you do to make me want to

Just don´t ever try
To find out why
I always keep you waiting
Some things are better left unknown

When I fall - if I fall
Darling hold me
´cause when I fall - if I fall
I will take you with me

You mean the world to me so
I ain´t gonna let go
I need you to cling to
What will you do to make me stop

Just don´t ever try
To find out why
I always leave you hanging
Some things are better left unknown

autumn romance finale of the 'fruit of our labour'

2006-10-22T20:03:00.000+08:00

all the models are damn gorgeous! even antoinette (the black one in gold gown) stands out among the rest. look at the gown on the first left side (the frilly burgundy & black). it's my favourtie gown! i had been drooling over it since the day it came. well, of course its way way above my budget for my wedding gown cos it would cost me 1/3 of my annual income (10k, mind u!). haiz...i will only try to design sumthin similar to it....good luck to me!

as we watched the finale on the runway, with the 14 string orchestra playing a beautiful symphony for the graceful models...we threw a sigh of relief. that is the conclusion of our long awaited autumn romance show...phew! well done, everyone!

post mortem show

2006-10-20T20:23:00.000+08:00

pre show stress...

2006-10-14T11:10:00.000+08:00

days of my life

2006-10-10T12:20:00.000+08:00

--------------------
friday 6th October 2006

*movies

hunny met me at 3pm at the cathay as we got one-for-one movie tickets. upon arrival, hunny took the coupon out and checked what shows to watch. little miss sunshine was our choice. but just as we were in the queue, hunny read the clause saying they only accept cash paymetn cos he wanted to pay thru visa. then we stepped out of the q. while in the search of an atm machine, he read the t&c again...offer valid from mondays to thursdays only... only...*cheh...anti-climax.....we were so ready to watch and hunny said its better we watch it during weekdays and make use of the offer. what a letdown...then we decided to go to funan.

*games

we window shop for technical stuffs at challenger and hunny had a hell of a great time playing games there. we were both off and i just watched him play. destress....
we ate at the foodcourt at 7pm to break fast...

*shop

at about 7.45pm, we travelled down to tangs to shop for shoes for me to dress up on our fashion show day. i am feeling ecstatic about the whole show event...
prior to that, we alighted at ngee ann city to get donuts from the basement one foodcourt. i commented to hun just at the brink of time "we haven't had those donuts for a long time hun..."
then hunny pressed the bus stopping bell and we swiftly budged out from our seats. hunny said i should have said that earlier cos he himself was yearning for those mouth watering donuts.
tako pachi was another thing that we were craving for...so we bought octopus flavour. with lots and lots of mayonnaise....slurps slurps
i carried the brown porter bag and hunny asked me to keep them in my bag first...they have various smell from mayo to octopus to chocolates and donuts smell...all gathered in my bag...mmmm.....but i guess its worth it....hehees....

*kinokuniya

we then strolled down to kinokuniya to stimulate our minds and in search of inspiration. i went to the fashion books section while hunny at the graphics and web design section. i totally devoured the books...in fact i had one of the fashion sketches template which was given by eza. and i read thru all the softwares that is applicable to fashion designing. inspires my inner soul.....gives me all kinds of ideas....though i had already in mind what to tailor for my 'hari raya' outfits, i am still open to ideas....

*loof

in the evening, hunny's boss invited hunny over to loof for drinks and supper. his ex-colleagues and stylists were there too. they were all asking "wan, is that your wife?".....promptly hunny replied, "yeah!" ....i had compliments from all of them that i look really good and that i do not look a tiny bit like a 29 year old. gosh....i'm so flattered....the fashion stylists had a few Q & A sessions with me asking about the nature of my career and they were looking at me with awe. the had no idea i have been in fashion line for more than 8 years...and that i looked very young to have that kind of experience...unbelievably true, i was a fashion buyer (dormant) who does the logistics more than travelling...so far i had gone to HK and JKT.
we went back around 3am from loof. feeling tipsy, hunny walked me down to the bus stop. we did not really enjoy being there but it was an experience having to sit with his boss and colleagues...

hunny then totally crashed upon reachin home, and i just had to rest my head....before long i was in my dreamland too...

----------------------
saturday 7th october 2006

* groupie

hunny met up with his cousins (afai & mel) & yaya to break fast at lau pa sat. while i had to hook up with them after i knocked off at 8pm. we were supposed to meet in the train going towards bugis from cityhall station. i was in my realm dress and with the matching white shoes and they gave me a compliment..."sis, u look so sweet & cute today.." but i was in pain. cos i bought the shoes like months ago and that was the first time i had them on. they were covered toes mules and i was only used to flip flops for the longest time.

we went to arab street to chill out at the sheesha place called "el sheikh". there were no more tables for the 6 of us (malek joined us much later) and we had a special corner sitting on the carpet near the restaurant. it was pretty cool cos we were the only ones with that privilege having all the corridor to ourselves....we shared apple sheesha, fries and cheese sticks waiting for malek to come riding with his bike. the mules of mine were detrimental i had to change to my sequins flip flops....however, overall...we had a loungey time there and played games from our phones...hunny's 'game of life' and mine 'bowling'.....totally cool....we talked about planning for trips together, halloween party and hari raya outings....sadly, hunny has to serve the nation from the 2nd day of 'syawal' month. my poor sweetheart...we only could spend the first day of hari raya together. hunny will be at my place on the first day afternoon and then we will be at hunny's place in the evening....then hunny have to prepare himself for reservist for 11days.....i'm gonna miss him terribly....

coming back to our group date....we left el sheikh at 11.15pm and mel took a ride from malek to marina square...while hunny, afai, yaya and myself took a bus as we wanted to go midnite bowling...i anticipated it's gonna be crowded and true enuf it was...so we watched a movie instead...'world trade centre'...it was a sorrowful show the gals weeped at the end of it.

all 4 of us (yaya, mel, fai & me) as usual, went back by sharing the same cab....we were really tired and quite silent throughout the journey home...i reached home at 3am...hunny texted me and glorified his own wife...stroking his own ego..."u look sweet. cute"

---------------------
sunday 9th october 2006

*exhausted

my energy level was depleting as the days are nearing to the big day, our autumn romance show....11th october 2006...nerve wrecking. draining our inner strength...one by one..niza, denah, sha & myself...the bosses are comin back and the buyers will be back to join us for th show...i was having butterflies in my stomach...they were flipping their wings and flying about and my migraines arised....

*complete

sha, niza, denah and myself had most of our preparations & logistics completed and we were so ready to face the bosses with pride. running down of all the things we had achieved during their absence and getting 85% of the event all equipped. that was how efficient we were aas a team...our uniform were in place and my RSVP list were overwhelming...f & b were also confimed and logistics arranged. staffing wise, i had lynette and joce to help and they were a great help before...i should think this time around they are even more efficient...hunny had to wait for me till 9.20pm and he was a little upset initially cos he left home at 7.30pm in a hope to meet me at 8pm sharp. thanks to my cajoling skills i managed to soften him and explained that it was a show we would like the media to cover so everything just had to be perfect and that he had to be proud of his wifey....

*dinner

we had a short dinner date at bencoolen and hunny just sent me to the bus stop at raffles town club just before hitting the expressway. he took bus 67 while i continued on the bus 190 to cck. hunny lent me his nike black sweater as i was freezing and i needed warmth throughout the journey...whithout hunny...

*designers

hunny reached home and continued with his websites and i continued with my sketches on the hari raya outfits...hunny told me that we are the midnite designers....hehees....i can live with that, in fact i am an aspiring designer....i wanna have my own label someday...

'long lost pal'

2006-10-04T16:59:00.002+08:00

hunny texted me yesterday afternoon around 1.30pm; "hunny, Dawn wants to meet up for dinner. you meet us at marina after work k?" i was excited to meet her once again after so long...lately i only chat with her thru msn and she was perpetually busy the whole time...

it's really a nice feeling to join hunny with his 'chinese sister' and we could just catch up with what we had been up to. furthermore, she had not seen me for awhile. the last i met her was 2 years ago but managed to speak thru msn and sms within this period.

i was wearing the bisou bisou rope-knit sweater over a coral color puff sleeves tee with my jeans and birkies. it was pouring yesterday morning and that fabulous top came in handy. kept me warm throughout the evening. i knocked off at about 8.30pm and hunny and her had already met up at about 7.40pm. they already had their dinner by the time i got there. i took the cab down to marina. dawn was in her black shirt and black pinstripe pants with black heels. she is in hotel industry and that is what she has to wear, suits, everyday....

i went to her and we cheek-kissed and she was lookin really good for a single babe...her hair is so gorgeous and silky...her smile is as sweet and pleasant as ever. i luv her for her...still as cheery and bubbly as ever...she told me to have my dinner as they were already full...and that i still look very skinny to her. i thought i have put on weight? hunny said my butt is getting bigger...hehee..well, anyhow, hunny just got me 3 fried springrolls...i shared with them as i was not that hungry...it was supposed to be the 'nyonya popiah' but hunny anticipated those fried ones with flour would taste better and was sumthin different. they were not bad after all...dawn commented that even for a non-chinese like me hold chopsticks way better than her. she was sooo embarrassed...but it was funny to know chinese gals like her and joce hold chopsticks a diffrent way, really cute i must say...subsequently after dinner, we walked dawn down to the train station before we headed to take the bus to my place. she had her car bumped and got it repaired and that was the first day she took public transport after so long. we exchanged cheek kisses once again...she was so fun to be with. and even after not hookin up for so long, we are still as close as ever...no awkward moments even when at silence mode. she is now trying to date and go out again as she is absolutely over her ex. we hope to see more of her soon.

upon reaching cck...hunny said he would have to take train back home instead cos there was no more last bus to his place....after he took the train, he texted me..."take care luv. i luv u..."
those are the words that made my day a beautiful one...

//...implausibly...incredibly...unbelievably perfect...//

all about eye

2006-10-03T02:15:00.000+08:00

my undereyes have improved...slowly, steadily and effectively...

this is the sample eye mask we are using for the models on the finale of the show. i had to model to see how it would look like....

baby boom?

2006-10-02T14:01:00.000+08:00

i just received an email from sue. she said she had been unwell for last 2 to 3 months. and that she heeded our advice on renting out her apartment and stays with her mum instead. furthermore her workplace is just a couple of stops away form her mum's. great news! she is expecting a baby boy! congratulations to her! we are just waiting to have a get-together and see how she is doing....Alhamdullilah....all thanks to God her baby is healthy and kicking....

well, well, mummy is actually now a granny too...with baby ethan...wow! this year is yet another 'baby boom' year?

she said in her email nazy is gonna back in town on 14th october. that is 10 days before Hari Raya..
and eza mite not be able to make it in time to celebrate with us...'sob 'sob...i miss all of them...gotta email them to check how they are doin now...

oh, by the way...u guys who are into games gotta watch this movie called 'stay alive'. hunny and i watched at The Cathay new cineplex last nite. we sat at the couple seats again....snuggled up with each other feeling comfy with the generous space for tiny lil us...hehe...and yea...oh! (slurps slurps!) look at me i have not even say it out and i'm drivelling during fasting month. prior to that, we had ben & jerry's! yippieeee!!! finally!...hunny ordered 'mix-n-match' for us. more for me though...we had mudslide, chocolate brownie fudge and cookies oatmeal...yum yum....to top it up, we added hot fudgie and peanuts over them. then i waited for hunny to come back to our seats and stared at the luscious 'mix-n-match' hoping they wont melt on the waffle and instead should be in my mouth...in 10 mins, hunny arrived, and i had already scooped each flavour a spoonful in my mouth...haha! greedy me! hunny said, "it's ok, i meant to buy it for u hunny..." then he helped himself later. then we were enjoying the ice cream too much we almost missed our show....that's how overpowering ben & jerry has affected us...

ciao

//...with lotsa luv...//

groceries shopping

2006-10-02T11:42:00.000+08:00

hunny met JD on saturday before fetching me from work. we went for dinner at cuppage food centre cos they wanted to watch footie which was supposed to start at 11pm. however, after dinner and their booze, we left cuppage at 10.15pm cos the TV screen was a little too small for our views...

then we headed to kimsia and mummy was home. we stayed till about 12.15am. mummy gave me a cute lil pressie from miu miu...a leather flower keychain. with a crystal on the flower. luvly...thanks to mummy...i inserted all my keys into the ring rite away together with the coach keychain hunny gave me. here they are next to each other...the silver star ones are coach and the black leather is miu miu...

hunny wanted to go shopping at mustafa..for groceries...and toileteries. we reached there at about 12.30am..took our sweet time and strolled around. we got a basket full of foodstuffs...exactly like how domestic couple would do...hunny needed the convenience of a trolley so, halfway thru shoppin, we went to the 1st floor to get it. upon reaching the 2nd floor again, as the elevator door opened...there was this educated looking man of indian nationality with 2 trolleys (one on each side) tryin to barge in to the elevator without making way for us to get out...then hunny stood there at the door stationary...waiting for him to move aside, hunny kept mum....then he used his hand gesture to show that man should make way for us first...

then something unpleasant blurted out from that man's mouth "u are the most inconsiderate son of a bitch!".....without hesitation, hunny defended "u are the one who is inconsiderate mother@#^&*er! go back to ur own cufking country!" and unsatisfied, he shouted "can't u see how much things i have?" Big fucking deal! he was the one who did not let us out with our trolley! and he dared to tell hunny off? who is the inconsiderate one? hun continued...."hey! what!? get over here if u are not happy with what i said! mother@#^&er!" then that man closed the elevator door and looked down and just left without fighting back...he deserved that!

then we went back to our shopping...hunny felt great telling him off cos if he were to say, excuse me please...we wouldn't be so hard on him.

Gosh! that was quite an experience...we then left mustafa by 2.45am...reached home at 3am. hunny was delighted we got to spend time together and doing shopping. he also said he would want to make me happy and pamper me all the time...we got our bond grown stronger everyday that passed...hunny said we both looked like we went back more than 10 years in time. i was wearing my jag army green long sleeves tee over the orange racerback and jeans...with my vans white-orange sneakers...i looked like 16! luv it! hunny was in his black "hatemonger" tee and jeans with his black vans leather sneakers....and he carried his porter backpack...as though we were from school or sumthing...luv said i have been maintaining my youth pretty well...

//...never-ending shopping spree...//
//
//
//

effectiveness on clinique

2006-10-02T01:48:00.000+08:00

*all about eyes

i have been using the 'all about eye' cream from clinique for 3 days 3 nites now. its really amazing. i haven't really been sleeping well but yet the cream really helped me...tremendously. and hunny realised it's not just sleep, i need some help too. and as i grow, (i still am lookin youthful though..) i gotta take care of my body and facial skin.

every morning as i woke up i had also been feeling fresher than ever. it's amazing i could just rest anytime with the cream. even hunny could use it too. it's for all skin types and reduce puffiness and lines too. my only concern is only the dark shadows under my eyes. but i do not have to worry any longer...all i need is 'all about eye'...

yaaayy!!!! felicitous!

2006-09-29T21:25:00.000+08:00

now i could take a breather...cos my bosses are already on the buying trip and i could focus on my areas of responsibilities again. and today being hunny's payday....hunny asked me to go shopping, mainly for me, of course..hehe...i have been wanting to get an agnes bag, but guess what? hunny got me a brown porter bag instead...wow! i'm a happy gal....its got very accessible compartments and huge space provides great convenience for me to go just about anywhere. its amazing, i felt like giving hunny a huge kiss at that moment...i could not ask for more. in fact, hun bought me a few other things...

1> an agnes b orange top,
2> lee vintage jeans
3> a vanezza regazza real pretty tiny floral printed midi skirt with brown ribbon sash
4> also a gorgeous bisou bisou ash mud high neck sweater (it's rope-knit)
5> oh, and this jag long sleeves dirty green top that i thought wouldn't look good on me...but as soon as i wear over my orange nike tee, voila! perfection! hunny said: "add it in, i'll pay..."
6> on top of that, i found my perfect vans sneakers too! it's all white with orange outline and a lil' patch of orange label at the back of the shoes. it's gonna match most of my bright colored outfits just like how my 'birkies' have been...my luv has really been pampering me this much! but haiz....my wardrobe seems to have a problem with space.....

oh...before i forgot! last nite we spotted a shop at far east plaza that sells custom prints tees and many one-off dresses. i tried on 2 dresses one of which that i luv very much and the other one, hunny insisted that i tried on too. the initial luvly fave 'retro' look short puff sleeves overlap dress was worn on....i couldn't believe i can look very dainty and i luv myself in that! it's stunning on me, seriously....then i fell in luv with that dress....and i actually refused to try on the one that hun likes....it's too preppy lookin with its 3/4 sleeves and the colors of the flower prints are too dowdy...i would look frumpish in that. but hunny luvs it for whatever reasons...he asked me to wear with either jeans or leggings...eeewww!! i wouldn't want to be wearin like that like everyone else....i want to be different....unique....no, no...i didn't get the one hunny asked me to. and so i bought the first one i set my eyes on...i looked really great, though hunny was a lil concerned about the neckline....even the salesgal thinks that dress looks better than the one hunny chose. its cute, has character....with its puffy midi bottom ala cancan underneath and turquoise sash tied at the waist. i luv it, i luv it, i luv it!!!

my first dress after so long...the last one was the avant-garde marithe francois girbaud from my workplace. and for this, i'm wearing it my own way...with a lil sumtin underneath the top to give a different touch to it.....not really accessories cos many would wear with beaded necklaces....i would play around with fabrics and ribbons....i shall experiment it later...

rite now i'm gonna crash cos i had been spending the whole nite with hunny....we had fun though was very beat....hunny is now at home, on his bed, smiling as he was happy he got his vans shoes and another porter backpack too...cool...

//...an awesomely quality shopping spree with hunny...thanks luv...//

wednesday fitting day

2006-09-28T00:21:00.003+08:00

yesterday, 12 models had been confirmed. we were supposed to come in at 9am to get things ready organised before the actual fitting started. as anticipated, i slept through after 'sahur' thinking i could wake up after sleeping for half an hour from 7am....

the moment i woke up at 8.15am..ooops! it was wishful thinking to reach my workplace on time. then i texted niza.."i can't make it at 9. maybe 9.30." she said "ok, c u..." she understood the pressure we are facing and that we definitely will have to put in extra hours and she is all prepared...being my subordinate, she had learnt the ropes from me pretty closely. so, i have always been her mentor.

we are gonna run the show still with the bosses getting surprises when they are back from the buying trip. i am in charge of the invites, RSVP, confirmed pax, seating plans and ushering the guests to the seats. overall, it's the turn-ups. i have to update sharon thru sms every 3 or 4 days. by the 30th all invites are expected to be sent out and the more heads confirmed comin the better. niza and denah are in charge of models and outfits respectively. while sha and gek are lookin into caterer, flowers and display change and layout more for gek. we are gonna work as a team....this show is gonna be the most talked-about show and lots of press coverage and other media bodies will be there to attend. now, i gotta seriously look into my invites. i only have 2 more days before its been completed. and the follow up has to be intensively monitored.

wow...pressure pressure pressure...

its a real challenge though. and i gotta source out for staffs on that day together with denah. that has been settled. i am gonna get joce form 7pm and lynette from 5pm to help in the miscellaneous prepearations that might have been overlooked. nitty gritty details that we as the supervisors do not have to do ourselves. delegation...the most important thing, that is.

well, today the models did not come all at the same time. we had only 8 girls and the rest of them (roisin; our fave besides katya, antoinette; the black and familiar face, tabatha & luciana) who came later except or antoinette. they were fitted from 7pm onwards while the muslim staff were breaking their fast. but we had 90% of the outfits prepared and things went quite smoothly (except another fittin for antoinette) and ended at 1015pm...final round of duties and update had been ran thru and we are clear of our designated areas...

prior to the adult models' fitting, we had the kids models who came at 3pm and everyone are just looking so adorably sweet and spontaneous. especially chloe who is the most chubby one among all. they had not only fitted with our baroque theme for the adult models. we could imagine how spectacular the show is gonna be.....really really excited and looking forward to seeing the fruit of our labour once again...

i've once checked my phone while having a sip of drink in the pantry at 9.30pm. i saw hunny's message saying: "i miss u baby. think i'm gonna catch fever. i'm shivering with the aircon off."

awww...my poor baybee....he's fallin sick..i asked where he was. still at the office he said and i was worried about him. but i had to return back to work and texted him back after i knocked off. at 10.35pm i just remembered yaya was at the gym at paragon and i did not text her whether or not we could take the bus home together. i was already on the bus when she replied me. she was walking to the bus stop by then. i was 5 minutes too fast. but she didn't mind...i thought she had left cos she did not text me today. well, though we planned, we are not fated to enjoy the bus ride home then..

so, tomorrow is supervisor meeting and we gotta come in at 10am....to discuss about the target and also our annual challenge. guess i will only take it from there and get my things all set and done....

//...am gonna hit the sack...//

.

fulfilment

2006-09-26T23:16:00.001+08:00

i was on my toes all day today. so were sharon, azman and my boss. the minute i reached my workplace, i started with the usual routine and had to continue from where niza left off. she had the new collections entered in the system half completed. as today being her offday, as her superior i gotta organise it myself. been standing the whole of 10 hours and the only time i sat was when it was 'breaking fast' time. that was only for what, 15mins? then shipments of new arrivals came one after another. all the gowns and dresses we are gonna use for the show on oct 11th, showed up...at the brink of time. cos the fittin of our 12 models is tomorrow....and we have to make sure the sequence of the outfits are pre-set. the absolute couture gowns we are showcasing for the first time (i'm not allowed to write the label here) which label is renown for being worn by hollywood celebrities for the oscars and grammys, also arrived. i had to not only process them but also to get them priced and tagged as my subordinate was not around. i am proud to say our store is the only store in asia that carries that label, the first one. we are sure many followers of this label who are so filthy rich would be so glad to visit our store for that...

totally exhausted..hunny managed to get home early today and break his fast at home. lucky him...well, he deserves more rest this week after the whole of last week full of events setups.

knocked off at 9.15pm, i took the bus as usual from the stop behind wisma. prior to that, i went to the washroom and hunny was asking what to do on friday as he would be off too. i was really glad he could make time for me! i asked him last week if he could do that but he said he has coach show happening on that day, no chance to even hook up. and just 3 hours ago, he wanted to plan sumthin so we could have a nice weekend together. breaking fast as a couple...

*ting! popped my bright idea....then came the urge to text yaya and ask afai along to have dinner together this friday. maybe they could be working in the day...but it's alrite hunny and i could do our shoppin and we could set the dinner plans later with yaya & fai.

alrite, hunny and i corresponded so much i forgot to text yaya. then i stopped tapping my PDA phone while takin the bus. and hunny stopped replying for awhile. i walked to the middle of the long bus and leaned against the curved stand to take a rest. i scanned through the bus and i thought i spotted a familiar face. but knowing me, i squinted and gave up lookin at the direction i thought i knew that someone. then the message tone went off..."nuthin i can tel u...u look good wen u wear it well....." electro...

it was yaya! such telepathy! it said: "hey, watcha doing? :-)"..

then i thought....mmmm? sounds weird....it might be her that i saw afterall....then i squinted my eyes again and looked hard at the direction i had diverted to 3mins before that. there were afai and yaya at the very end of the bus seating down smiling and waving back at me....i was really blind as a bat. so silly...then i texted her back: "i thought i saw u! sorry, a lil' tired...need to lean..."

she replied: "it's ok..happy leaning.."

i asked her about the plan on friday. whether or not they would want to eat with us...she checked and asked, what about saturday? i said its also fine....then after 5mins of re-checking her schedule, she gotta let me know it's her buka time with her granddad. alrites! next weekend is fine by me.

upon reaching the bus terminal at choa chu kang, we (afai fetched her home) walked towards our residences...we (yaya & me) stay within the same proximity and parted at a junction. yaya wanted to have dinner with me tomorrow before her gym session at fitness first at paragon. however, i explained to her that i do not have the luxury of time to eat out. cos our model fitting is at 7pm...and we would be eating only for like 15 - 20 mins? then back to work till probably 11pm....i hope by 10.30 we are gonna be done and the final touches would be made nearrer to the actual day of the show...then tomorrow probably yaya and i could go back together then i would have a company on the way home.

just gotta be on top of things...today i had accomplished a lot against our checklist with regards to the fashion show....azman and i did a number of smart moves that impressed our boss. well, we had to get things organised before the buying trip....pretty stressful but we are enjoying it....healthy stress i suppose is alrite...

//...gonna crash and have a fresh start yet again tomorrow...//

older & wiser

2006-09-26T06:51:00.000+08:00

i re-read my blog and i had to abstract this part of my entry dated 04th august 2006
with the title: twenty-five days to twenty-nine :

"i'm not the perfect person or the one who knows everything about anything. but i do analyse, scheme and i do want to step up in the areas where i'm lacking in. its a fast moving pace at this age where we have to be savvy, vigilant and fructify. its what we are willing to do, not what others ask of u and you are obliged to do. total obligations can be harmful in the long run.

as we grow, we get wiser. its what i believe and anticipate. anything that evolves around you should not be limited to only what you have right now. we should set our own goals and aim far, further than your own comfort vicinity. then once we have achieved one goal, move to another and try walking out of the current proximity. try to get lost and find our way back again and try all over again...it will eventually attain to ur own wisdom. the satisfaction of an accomplishment is the best feeling. u will feel real proud of yourself. never give up. move forward and do not get apprehensive of what the future holds for you.

so, having said all that...yea i am excited to see what the future holds for me. cos we have been taking the efforts to get to where we are now. hunny is so proud of me as much as i am of him. our families have been supportive and now that they (our parents) have met up...they would not want to force anything on us. its all up to us to decide."

i think i have grown older and wiser as the years pass....we have matured in many ways..

//...post me any comments if u share the same sentiments...//
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the scientist

2006-09-26T06:07:00.001+08:00

Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry

You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you i set you apart

Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming up tails
Heads on a silence apart

Nobody said it was easy, it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be this hard
Oh take me back to the start

I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart

Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy, Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be so hard

I'm going back to the start





>>>>luvly luvly lyrics.....



mmm....chris martin & gwyneth paltrow...



what a great couple with their baby apple..


hunny had since nicknamed me his 'gwyneth'....cos i was as skinny as her and himself as 'chris'....

his....mine and our songs...

2006-09-25T22:22:00.000+08:00

today i had severe tummy cramps...maybe its indigestion or just stale air. to make it worse, migraines came attacking. then the moment i had to come out from my office to the floor and help out i got even more cranky. it's really unsually disturbing. as the time to break fast got nearer, i felt faintish. no, it's not cos of hunger, just sumthing was not rite. hunny wanted to break fast with me when he called at 6pm saying he gotta send some stuffs to river valley and that eating together would be great. i had to turn him down cos i had food i brought from home..and that i would be eatin with niza and kay in the pantry. so, he decided to break fast at home. prior to that, he was also suggesting eating together with us in the pantry but it was not appropriate. hunny badly wanted to eat with me and yet he couldn't. i felt bad initially but i thought it'd be better he get home earlier and rest well enough to be rejuvenated tomorrow. cos today he too, was not feelin well and had to come in to the office late around noon. that was why he was a little peevish....he did not sleep that much either.

subsequently, at 7.15pm hunny texted me sayin he was on the bus still and when i did not text him back he said i was like not bothered about him...i was just washing the dishes after my meal and would be replying his message wen i was done. i asked if he had sumthin to munch cos break fast time was way over and the sun had set. sadly, he said no. i was worried cos hunny would have a bad tummy if he eats late too. so, upon knocking off at 8pm i tried calling him if he was back home. once, no answer. second time at 8.10pm, too, no answer. i got worried...the third time, i got through and he said he was home since almost wat, 8pm? gosh! i was glad. then i suppose he could rest well now....

i got home at about 9pm. i asked hunny if there is one song that he would associate me with him, what would that be.

he replied, "the scientist" by coldplay. mmm...that's a sad sad song i must say. but the first time i heard that song was when we broke up years ago. he asked me to listen over and over again. so i did...we both cried cos just before listening to it we had a MAJOR fight. we lost our sanity at that moment....i was tough, i wanted out...he pulled me back....

then he texted me again..."there is also gravity (by embrace) and run (by snow patrol). what about u then?" i replied...."i got a couple. aqualung's strange and beautiful.......and incubus' i miss u..."

well, they are everything about us...missing one another...can't get enough of each other. rock songs...touch our fragile little hearts.....

then, hunny brought up the issue about us starting our own line, our own business. fashion. street meets high fashion. i had always wanted to excel in fashion...that's been the industry i have been since almost 9 years ago....before, i was the most vain one in the whole family since i was really young...au contraire i did not play with make up...in fact i was the most tomboyish among all my siblings (6 gals incldg me) who went around climbing the trees in front of my village house, jumping off the stairs from one landing to another at my old blocks (yea, its unbelievably thrilling!) to chasing the boys in school's canteen till i bled my knee (that was in secondary school days)
what i always do when i was young was playin with outfits and mix and match em to give a diff touch and sense of styles, of my own. colors...yellow and orange have been my fave. and white being the neutral, to me, can never go wrong. turqouise too, will always attract me while other colors like green, blue, purple and so on are secondary. it would depend on the tones...

well, hunny wants to target to come up with sumthing next year. it would be our new year resolution. hunny told me we will be setting our date in december...as i anticipated, it would be best on our anniversary date..1st dec 2007(1122007)...it's a saturday! perfecto! absolutely brilliant!

"with u around always give me peace, brings me inspiration, get my creativity flowin. i always get all kinds of ideas when im with u..."

now, that is a such a wonderful speech by hunny to end my day....delighting me always...

//...gonna refabricate my clothes and get them revamped to a whole new look...till then...//

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extraordinary weekend

2006-09-25T13:38:00.000+08:00

so, where did i stop? last i entered my blog was on my offday thursday at 2pm...cos i was busy with my HR reports and other work stuff to complete. was supposed to go for a massage with mummy but at 8am that day she told me to go alone instead cos she had to check on her gastrics problem. so, i decided to stay in and complete my work....while hunny was busy too, with the YSL setup on that day at paragon till late at nite and he texted me about his agony at work.

then...upon completion of my work, i went to bed pretty late as i did not realise it was almost 3am. hunny got home around midnite. he was extremely beat. the folowing day was friday and it was the YSL show. hunny said he wanted to meet up after the whole show was over and he would be there for tearing down the setup. i waited till almost 10pm and hunny didn't have much time to be with me cos he had to finish up his work at YSL then he left paragon to continue setup at Hugo Boss ngee ann city. he left orchard at about 2.30am...beat again...

i, too, was really tired even when i had my day off. it was work all the way. it's pretty intense for the both of us...but hunny said he is still missing me and i wanted to meet him on saturday too....so, hunny arranged to hook up on saturday after he was done with hugo teardown. he cut his hair! lookin good, he gave me a smile that aroused my emotions...from fatique to mystique.....

so then hunny had his dinner while i watched him cos i had my late lunch at 6.30pm. wow! it was almost like the break fasting time...well, it makes no difference to me...eating earlier or later....i could forgo food...for now...

after his 'bad' dinner on saturday, we took a bus to funan to look for better food. so we thought of taco's and we had quesadilla and cheese fries. hunny mentioned his regrets eating at lucky plaza earlier. we shared the taco's meal and hunny had most share cos i was still quite full then. after which we walked down to singapore river to enjoy the nite breeze before we went home. left that place at about 11pm.

i was glad we could at least spend a couple of hours on that saturday cos hunny needed me to inspire himself again after a long week...full of exhaustion nites....i am glad i am his comfort just like he is to me...

came sunday, the first day of the fasting month, he was sleeping in the whole day after his 'sahur' (morning meal before dawn). he said he did not realise he was that exhausted till he woke up at 12 noon....at about 3pm yesterday he texted me "busy, luv?" i was definitely busy this period. it's the buying trip season and the autumn romance show is just around the corner.

then, last nite hunny fetched me from work to see me again...we never get enough of one another.....though that was his only offday, he wouldn't mind to spend more time with me. upon reaching the vicinity of my residence, we met my elder sis and family. hunny shook hands with my bro-in-law and the kids kissed our hands too. my sis told me mom cooked 'mee bandung' for buka puasa. and it was really tempting hunny. it was almost 11pm and the last bus was at 11.10pm back to his residence. however, hunny went ahead to taste his future mum-in-law's overpowering 'mee bandung' (red soup noodles).

as usual, he over-consumed the chilli padi (baby chillies) which led him to clear his 'system'....
but overall, the meal was fabulous...haven't had that for such long time....i luv my mom's cookings. nowhere else has the same cooking skills so far, apart from my granny (my mum's side). so, hunny left at 11.15pm. he had no choice but to take the train back to eunos....and reached home at about 12.20am....i felt pretty bad he had to get home that late....but him on the other hand would do anything for his luv......me!

well, now is the time i have my duties up again...my other responsibilities for the fashion show. it's real madness....crayzee.......

//...till then...//

>.c.o.p.y.c.a.t.< >.t.a.c.y.p.o.c.<

2006-09-21T14:45:00.000+08:00

They had an accident
and they never noticed anyway
A lack of originality
couldn't focus on the day
So much for the radio
everybody sounds the same
Everybody wears the same clothes now
and everybody plays the game

Copycat, copycat, copycat
Copy copy copy copy yourself
Copycat, copycat, copycat
Copy copy copy everyone else

I've got a great idea
I will change things on my own
I see my vision very clear,
wouldn't wanna be another clone
So much for the radio, the radio is sad
Sad, sad, sad

They had an accident
but they never noticed anyway
A lack of originality
couldn't focus on the day
So much for the radio
everybody sounds the same
Everybody wears the same clothes now,
and Everybody plays the game

//...cranberries knows me best...//

rush rush....

2006-09-21T13:49:00.000+08:00

Youre the whisper of a
Summer breeze
Youre the kiss that puts my
Soul at ease
What Im saying is im
In to you
Heres my story and the
Story goes
You give love, you get love
And more than
Heaven knows
Youre gonna see
Im gonna run, Im gonna try
Im gonna take this love
Right to ya
All my heart, all the joy
Oh baby, baby please

Rush, rush
Hurry, hurry lover
Come to me
Rush, rush
I wanna see, I wanna see ya
Get free with me
Rush, rush
I can feel it, I can feel you
All through me
Rush, rush
Ooh what you do to me

And all I want from you is
What you are
And even if youre right
Next to me
Youre still too far away
If Im not inside your arms
I get dramatic baby,
Yes I know
But I need you, I want you
Ooh man, I love you so
Ooh, ooh
Youre gonna see
Im gonna run, Im gonna try
Im gonna take this love
Right to ya
All my heart, all the joy
Ooh baby, baby please

When you kiss me
Up and down
Turn my senses all around
Oh baby, oh baby
I dont know
Just how or why
But no one else
Has touched me
So deep, so deep
So deep inside
Youre gonna see
Im gonna run
Im gonna try
Im gonna take this love
Right to ya
All me heart, all the joy
Oh baby baby please

//...all time fave since my secondary school days...//

more frens.....

2006-09-21T13:06:00.000+08:00

>>>>>yuana (in white), me & her 2 other frens on her b'day<<<<<

>>>>>the instructors, hun & me<<<<<<<

robin's wedding dinner 2004

2006-09-21T12:37:00.000+08:00

>>>>>>>>>>galmourous us...moi, kay, niza<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

>>>>>>>>>>>>not-couple-azman+kay<<<<<<<<<<<<<

>>>>>lurvely married couple, now proud parents of baby ethan<<<<<<
>>>>>(kay took this pic, it's not very good...blurred pic of bride)

>>>>beauties: gigi, cindy, kay, niza, denah, moi, shihua<<<<<

the art

2006-09-21T12:22:00.000+08:00

yet another casting day

2006-09-20T23:36:00.000+08:00

*cuties

today it was casting for kids models...they have absolutely really sweet, pure, pretty faces. mixed, pan-asian offsprings....so adorable little ones...such cuties.....and some of them could do the catwalks way better than the adult models....i am serious!

they are ranging from 4 to 7 years old. with their com-cards and all...some missed schools. they really started young, mind u! and i believed they really could earn quite a hefty sum of cash if they are in high demand...mmm, great lookin young babes! make me wanna produce my own offsprings...like in 5 years? i dunno, its all up to God. i can only pray but only He will grant me should it be destined....i am now focusing more on my career.

*loof

after work, i called hunny up to check if he's alrite....he was busy still at loof. he texted me saying they did not sleep the whole of last nite. and tonite after the event they would tear down the set-up at about 3am...then stayed over at carlton hotel. he was actually enjoyin it more now cos he has a new buddy, kelvin. though he's new hunny could chat with him in his guy self. cos the rest of his colleagues are gals and they do not have much to talk about with him. so, then i suppose while working, he is destressing at loof now and tryin to put up with the sleepless nites in a row. i hope tomorrow hunny will get half the day off and i could meet him awhile to see how he is doing...

*massage

mummy and i are goin for our massage sessions at pan pac hotel at 12nn. mummy wants to go for a swim before that but i thought maybe i would give it a miss this time...cos i would rather sleep in a bit longer before i get up for the massage appointment. so, i will just meet her at pan pac at 11.30am on thursday morning. it's gonna be a day of rest and peace. but i suppose when i get back home, my work will be waitin for me to conclude before the meeting on friday.

*list

goodness gracious! it's gonna be another round of casting on friday at 8.3oam! i almost forgot! aarrgghh!!!! this is the most toughest period, to keep choosin the really good models and at the same time to stay dynamic with all the sale activities. i've got a long full 2 A4 pages of to-do-checklist. here goes.....

1. >hire temp staffs before oct 2006
2. >prepare HR reports by friday 22nd sept 2006 (it's for 20 staff we're talkin abt)
3. >find out about a staff's maternity leave
4. >get the rest of the SOPs (standard operating procedures) completed (like 4 or 5 more?)
5. >tally the uniforms
6. >plan for buying trip schedules & roster
7. >updates on the mailing list & invites
(real nice rich velvet red invites with silver hot stamps)
8. >send out mailers by saturday 23rd sept 2006
9. >assist in preparations for closure of scotts by next month
10. >prepare the outfits for fashion show by tuesday 26th sept 2006
11. >meetings & quotations with modernage (event co.)
12. >source for victorian outfits for the staff on the fashion show day
13. >get red velvet wrist corsages for staff (autumn romance theatre is the theme)
14. >source for victorian period props (masquerades, face masks, feather & many more)
15. >make copies of the A&P dvds from suppliers & fashion shows
(my gosh! this itself is gonna take up a whole chunk of my working hours)
16. >re-organise files from all the imacs in 3 stores (!!aaarrrggghhh!!)
17. >update on the re-lookup sold items from the computer system (MAJOR work too)
18. >re-organise on the re-print of price-tags file
19. >update database
20. >plan for year-end clearance sale & stocktake
(thought we just concluded the mid-year stocktake? how time flies)

> and the list go on and on and on and on and on..............

*mr.prata

after work niza, azman, kay & myself were fetched to mr.prata eating place at bukit timah by kay's sweetheart. we were that hungry we had to 'fight' for food...i mean, before niza's and mine came, kay's food was looking really appealing. so, we tasted hers and i was impressed with the way it's been done. ikan bilis fried rice and on top there was this beautifully fried egg that was so perfectly cooked the way hunny and i always like it....ala mcdonald's mcmuffin's eggs...with the yolk still intact in the centre still soft and the white is really white still......splendid! so i asked for more from kay and so did niza...kay literally pushed her plate aside away from us both and we anticipated kay being her, would not be able to finish up her food so we suggested 'eatin' for her...haha...such greedy lil' devils fighting for food....just like small kids or worse...but we did not embarrass ourselves, in fact we were having so much fun tonite cos we joke around like alot! like nobody's business.....the lamest of the lame jokes we could think of......each of us have different individual sense of humours... though we looked kinda silly, we enjoyed each other's company. to destress from work......had fun...laughed our heads off, letting out all the crayzee selves in us....makin full use of the time together and not to think of work the whole time. we are so comfy among ourselves....

*listerine

then when it was time to go home, all 3 of them waited for me to take the bus home alone. there was 67 bus service that stop rite at my place...perfecto! before i left them, we had a good laugh about the ad that is on almost every bus stands.....

azman said "should all of us use listerine, we will be all smiles all day, 24/7 hehehe.....be it when we are mad or sad or tired or even sleeping" flashing his whites and we all bursted into really loud laughters again....LOL.....total crap! real madness.....

//...about time to be crayzee...//
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embarrasing moment

2006-09-20T02:05:00.003+08:00

after window shopping at tangs, i took the bus not realising that my ezlink card was of no value. as i tap the card...it produced 'tet tet tet tet tet' sound & message "please top up your ez-link card" on the machine.... the driver had already closed the doors behind me, and moved..

i blurted "scheisse!" (shit! in german)....had my card holder rampaged, i search for coins and only to find them in vain "scheisse" again.....i've had a $10 bill but i couldn't be paying that amount for the bus journey, can i? so, i just asked the nearest person, who sat facing the other passengers if she had any change for my $10. she did not say she didn't have it, but she asked me how much i needed instead...embarrassed, i replied, $1.60. then she took out the coins out of her purse and handed over exactly $1.60 worth of coins....then i waited for her other $8.40 but she said "just take it, it's ok".

"no, i have to exchange with you my $10 note..u could just give me all $2's"....though i saw she had a few of that, she insisted i just take the coins and keep my $10 bill. i was really grateful i thanked her 3 times..."thanks" (once) then i went to the driver's and placed the fare in the box...then i was obliged to sit, next to her cos that was the nearest seat i could grab and blushin, i thanked her the second time. she just said "it's alrite". well, i fumbled and fidgeted sitting next to her...but she just gave me numerous smiles of sincerity. i couldn't believe there is still such kind soul who would offer some coins to the forgetful, silly me...haiz...then i texted hunny and told him the whole 'embarrassin moment' of mine. then hunny replied..."heh. shit happens"....

that's true. u will never know when it may happen to u cos i'm pretty sure anyone of us would have had some moments like this. then, as she was about to alight at bukit panjang...i thanked her for the third & last time...(do i ask for her number?) my head was asking. it was for the purpose of returning the money back...but she was in a hurry and i was embarrased i shut my eyes as if i was sleeping till i got to the bus stop i was supposed to alight at.

it was as though the rest of the passengers were lookin at me...how silly could i get. they must have thought i did not top-up my card on purpose. Heck! who cares what they think....it really slipped my mind.

//...*phew.....after i alighted that was what i released....//

tuesday casting day

2006-09-20T00:09:00.000+08:00

we had to come in at 9.30 am to get the casting of over 30 models done. for our show, just the females.. as for modernage (event co.), with the males too...all of them looked pretty ok, but the males were not really mesmerising (u wish!)....boring.....hey, viv! focus!!! so, for the females, we had only a handful chosen (like 5 or 6) out of the 37 of them who came in. we have a panel of us who set the yardstick for whom we think will fit in our autumn winter collections...ball gowns, skirts and bustiers, voluptuous womanly figures.....the collections are superb! absolutely gorgeous luxurious gowns like u've never seen before...though many of the models were tall, they either do not have that exotic look we are seeking or couldn't walk like how we had anticipated....no, no, they must be perfect...not just good...ought to 'fit the bill' from our criterion chart.....and this is our first show without the bosses around for the whole preparations, the processes before we get down to the rehearsal on the morning of the actual day itself, oct 11th.....i'm totally excited all over again....

then, as we were discussing and all the models had left, there was another one very particular male model with a 'to-die-for body' walked in lookin completely relaxed and natural....he's got gorgeous blue eyes, i tell u! really deep set and sexy eyes...and no, he's not a blonde...he's brazillian!...(eza, nazy, droolzzz....slurps slurps!) haha....even azman and niza were literally leading me to 'eyes flirt' with him....my back was facing him and each time i turned around niza said 'look at his eyes, look at his hair, everything about him was perfect....' and out of all the other male models, he's got the strongest walk. very masculine and with charisma, there was this aura around him that just made us looked at him in awe.

but, 'ting 'tong! knock, knock! he's just a model, could be gay....only azman would know but he didn't really utter a word. then the life 'mannequin' left our store.....and back to reality......just curious, i asked Jean (who took pic of him doing the walk), the modernage event specialist, what his name was....and the name just matched his entire looks.....Jean Carlos.....cute...

well...that was our casting day. i had a few of other things to look at. i had drafted a layout of an ad for wed ST classads. we are hiring temp staff. so, i did that and parrallel to that too, i did the mailing process for the invitations. wow! lots of work, and i couldn't believe i am still very hyper. oh! i got it.....i had my 'mocha' dosages at work, that's why.....i luv the addition of milo powder (i'm talkin about 3 or 4 tablespoons of milo) into the unsweetened low calories cafe mix. and also, i had very late lunch too. and supper. maybe i've gained some weight huh? let me see in a few more days before the fasting month....

at 7.50pm hunny called me up at work to say that he was at paragon to get some stuffs for his boss and his colleague, kelvin was with him. he wanted to meet me even for a bit. i was quite eager to knock off soon and meet him too....the 'child' in me was really excited and i was flipping my watch every 3 minutes after hunny hung up. so, then i got changed at 8.05pm. hunny texted me 'hang on'. then a few minutes later he said he was at the 1st floor of paragon. i got my stuffs ready and asked mummy to check thru' my bags. then the next minute, hunny came to my workplace and surprised my colleagues...kelvin was with him too. hunny was in his agnes b dark purple tee with 501 jeans. kay said sumthin to hunny.."hey, u've grown ur hair now huh? ok... just cos ur getting married soon?" eerrr......though we are getting hitched, but that wasn't the reason for his hair....however, we just went along with her assumptions. he just didn't have the time to go to the hairdresser, that's all. as matter of fact hunny didn't really look after himself the past few months. he was too busy for other things besides work and me, of course. hehe...

so, kelvin and hunny had to be back to the office to get other stuff before they head to the loof. most prolly they are staying at carlton just for setting up the loof.

before i left hunny to get back to work, we exchanged kisses and he seemed very jubilant all of a sudden....and i told him i luv him...he replied the same and held me lightly before we parted. i then walked towards tangs, thinking of shopping. but nuthing excites me there. wanted to get a new set of mascara and pressed powder from ipsa but they did not have the stocks. what luck!

so then i left for home at 9.30pm. feeling regretful that no shopping was done..*sighs*

perhaps tomorrow? or thursday?

//...perhaps, perhaps, perhaps...//

brighty monday!

2006-09-19T23:27:00.000+08:00

its just an unusual monday this week. hunny had to meet me cos i had to pass to him the D&G jeans azman had given to me 6 years ago. i only wore it a couple of times cos it's not my size...28 or 29? hunny could fit it better, anyway its male cut. so, i went to his office and reached at 9pm. hunny said he may not be able to finish in time to have dinner with me.....i had anticipated that..so, after hunny's kiss, i left and headed to the train station. i took very slow and small steps still hoping hunny would call me in a few minutes to say he could already leave and meet me. i procrastinated, going to the ladies' washroom and was lookin into the mirror wodering why the people around were scrutinising me and its not like i've never had that kind of attention...but on monday was extraordinarily overwhleming that i felt paranoid. however, hunny told me it's cos i look good! he luvs the way i look. i was in his fave faded black base ed hardy tee over yellow singlet that i overlayered together and mary j tight miss sixty's. i look very electro chic. well, at least hunny admits his wifey-to-be is just as hip....without a doubt...

we went to bencoolen for dinner. as usual we had the mee goreng and hokkien mee from our fave store. hunny needed his 'energy booster'. then we walked up to the SMU seats where there was not many souls passing by. listening to the ipod, hunny sang his luv songs to me....

*walking after you by foo fighters...

Tonight Im tangled in my blanket of clouds
Dreaming aloud
Things just wont do without you, matter of fact
Im on your back, Im on your back, Im on your back

If you walk out on me, Im walking after you
If you walk out on me, Im walking after you

If youd accept surrender, Ill give up some more
Werent you adored
I cannot be without you, matter of fact
Im on your back, Im on your back, Im on your back

If you walk out on me, Im walking after you
If you walk out on me, Im walking after you

Another heart is cracked in two, Im on your back

I cannot be without you, matter of fact
Im on your back, Im on your back, Im on your back

If you walk out on me, Im walking after you
If you walk out on me, Im walking after you
If you walk out on me, Im walking after you

well, that explains it all.....

//...rock & luv...//

overwhelming emotions...

2006-09-17T22:15:00.000+08:00

*blissful

yesterday was the bossini event at heeren and hunny asked me to drop off at heeren bustop before starting work. excited, i did. cos it's a week long since we last met. last thursday he wanted so much to meet me...and now, at long last! i met him at 9.50am on saturday. before i alighted from the bus, i saw hunny eagerly standing up from the bossini fashion show footage and walkking up to the bus stop to welcome me...."welcome to my 'show'"...he said. then, i gave him my most gratifying smile after the osculation....he introduced me as his fiance to his colleagues. and his attention was taken away from work for awhile upon my arrival cos he just couldn't take his eyes off me. i was blushing then...my heartbeat escalating...i got a morning glory...splendor of bliss from heaven...

he said he had to meet me. and that he was hoping that the tearing down of the footage will be done speedily so he could have enuf rest before meetg me....so, it ended at about 4 and he headed back to his office to rest. then he met me at city hall at 8.45pm. we went to funan for dinner. we walked the quiet street down from the train station to funan...its cos of the road diversions that cityhall was really quiet for a saturday. but it was alrite for us cos we needed some peace.

during dinner, hunny gave the most overwhleming speech..."u know...when i met u in the morning, it really totally made my day..." i was just dumfounded. our eyes just paused on each other....i couldn't reply...its my heart saying..."how come he is feeling the same way that i do?"
it's just the strong telepathy.....feelings reciprocated.....

my heart was filled with joy and glee....hunny never fail to make me feel like a little gal all over again....digression slided into my focus on the noodles.......i was not hungry anymore. the 'food' of luv he 'fed' me had been consumed to make me full......after dinner, we strolled down to the singapore river....

*trip

us, the two luvbirds, so attached...sitting by the river with all the zingy vibes all around us...in luv? more than that...an absolutely enchanting moment.....soothed my tired mind....feeling nostalgic and brought back to the memories of 'ode to my girl' presented to me at that place...that was the title of the poem he wrote for me. i found that pretty amusing at that moment cos i didn't know he was 'the one' back then, like 12 years ago? i was spoilt for choice with a few guys who i went out with (just friends, one chinese)....then he popped out with his spontaneous creativity that didn't really 'capture' my heart. i didn't understand the meaning of luv until hunny led me to it.

then, with all those flashbacks...i was suddenly nudged by hunny. about his proposition to go on a holiday soon. he badly wants to take a break especially after working on events consecutively and almost didn't have time for me. so, he wants to make this trip a memorable one for us both. the last time we went to Bangkok was in february this year. but cos i was with the group from my company, hunny was left alone to go shopping, have meals and even travel alone to and fro. i only met him on the nite my colleagues thought i 'went missing'. all of them were worried sick especially my roommate, niza. cos it was like 1am BKK time and i was nowhere to be found in the whole hotel vicinity. that was really crazy...everyone were searching for me high and low and when i came back to the hotel room, i found most of them looking really glad i was back. i was really unaware i created the worries in them. they just couldn't sleep til i got back to my room. they almost lodged a report to the police. well, i gave an excuse about getting the prepaid phonecard at the nearest 7-11 and got the help from the staff there...thy bought that, and i was moved by their concern. it was a mixed feeling of frissons and moved to tears....

well, well.....now hunny wants to re-visit bkk....this time, with me and he has me all to himself. cos the last 4years hunny tagged along to Bali was also not really a time for us both to be together the whole of the 4days there. cos we had company meetings, discussions and the spouses and partners had to sacrifice. only now we have a destination for a getaway and not be disturbed by work stress altogether.

so, question is...when? the veins of my midbrain being branched out to the senses of my body...

i have tried to take leave or scheme to have a 3-offdays joint. and hunny is pretty serious about this 'anti-stress' vacation and have been looking forward to it for some time now. i wish its as simple as that. dilemma struck me. work is a priority...but so is hunny. i just have to apply for the leave and try to get this vacation agenda going....

*probability

ahhh!!!! right now i have the brightest idea! i could take a couple of days leave on the first weekend of the syawal month.....cos i know definitely that leave is granted as i did not apply for any leave at all last year. and this year i would be top priority. so, the probability of me getting the vacation with hunny is definitely high.

*movie

we went home at around 11pm. hunny messaged me awhile after and asked. "we havent watched movie for awhile eh, luv?" i said, "we can do that next weekend..." and maybe we could shop for household products at ikea; our yearly affair....during the fasting season. then tonite, he asked me to hurry home to watch a korean comedy....wishing we are stayin together.

*grateful

before i left work he texted me..."sweetie, watime u goin back? juz wanna say i luv u, and i thank god for u. i dreamt of u juz now." it was such simple text message that melted me. i was on the verge of tearing....but the tears was held back. i replied..."baby, im glad u feel d same way. its pure luv we share...ive been thanking God i've found u too, all these years.."

it just made my day....such sweetheart of mine....im totally grateful to God we have each other...

//...now, i am just gonna enjoy the sleep and gonna meet hunny again tomrrow...//

hari raya 2002

2006-09-16T02:27:00.001+08:00

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 4 yrs ago...hunny, me, mel, yaya & afai.....

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> the feminine side of the 'boys'

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> gals are just gals......

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> i was the only one in different color code suit self-designed...

couples.....the ones in burgundy are naz & zam, the soon-to-be-married & behind is me & hun..

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> all squeezed in naz's bachelor room....

more of me!!!!

2006-09-16T02:08:00.000+08:00

Gravity Embrace lyrics

2006-09-16T01:12:00.002+08:00

Honey
It's been a long time coming
And I can't stop now
Such a long time running
And I can't stop now
Do you hear my heart beating?
Can you hear the sound?
Cos I can't help thinking
And I don't look down...

And then I looked up at the sun and I could see
Oh the way that gravity turns for you and me
And then I looked up at the sky and saw the sun
And the way that gravity pulls on everyone
On everyone...

Baby its been a long time waiting
Such a long long time
And I can't stop smiling
No I can't stop now
Do you hear my heart beating?
Oh can you hear that sound?
Cos I can't help crying
And I won't look down...

And then I looked up at the sun and I could see
Oh the way that gravity turns on you and me
And then I looked up at the sun and saw the sky
And the way that gravity pulls on you and I
On you and I

//...last year, at this time hunny shed tears for me cos of this song...//
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urban pullout

2006-09-15T00:56:00.000+08:00

if you happenned to obtain the straits times dated today, u would see the bossini advert on the last page of the urban pullout. hunny was one of the responsible person who did that ad. he had been workin his ass off on it for nites and even had to had it changed for the umpteenth times and yet the bossini management was preposterously demanding. the deadline was absurd. he had been crackin his brains out and had to endure sleepless nites just to design the artwork. still they were discontented. they wanted the best of the best. and now that the ad was out, came the setting up. as hunny also has been doing drawings for the set up of the fashion show layout he would have to stomach their demands and try his very level best to do a good job at it. without a doubt, he is a very dedicated individual when it comes to completing his jobs....especially so when he is capable of doing the tasks given.

and so he was glad it is gonna be over soon. the fashion show is gonna be this saturday at heeren. as he is gonna be the one who instruct how the set up would be, next couple of nites would be long ones for him and some of his crew. the worst was that i wouldn't be able to maybe see him on saturday nite. most prolly i just drop by at heeren to have a look at the show. to see what bossini has in store for us that they had to make such a big fuss over the advert for this show. well, hunny would be so glad once the tearing down of the setup is done.

last nite he texted me wen he got home..."it would be more fun when you see your work comin to life." then wen i knocked off from work, i asked if he was home at 8.30pm, he replied.."ya, eatin now. take care sweetie. miss u"......i told him i missed him too, and that i need his 'huggies'. he felt the same way. we just had to comfort one another and make the other feel luv at the moments we are feelin low or worn out. i could understand the fatique hunny is undergoin rite now. however, he still luvs his job, though the people around could be makin him feel shitty at times....well, who doesn't feel that way? anywhere everywhere, there is bound to have snooty people who just get on everyone's nerves. it's like as though they see nuthin wrong in themselves....showing much sniffiness and putting other people down.

so, hunny was being his mellow self and fighting back the silent way. he had been keepin his temper in check. his evilness had gained sophistication. he is waiting for someone to trip his wire then he has more points against them....to use his intellectual ways in striking back. but as for now, he is just enjoying his job for as long as he could. so am i.....though at this very moment i had been real stressed out cos the SOPs(standard operating procedures) have been haunting me for the whole month even when i go to bed. i gotta do this perfectly.....i am capable, up to it....yea, afterall my bosses said that they have high hopes for me to be one of the key leaders in the company.....besides sharon.

i was somewhat flattered initially...but now im feeling the pressure is on the high side, intensifying. as i go along, there are a number of times i just wanted to give up and broke down....but i managed to come to my senses as i question myself time and again....why would i be in this position if i am not competent enough in tackling the perplexing situations? cos my bosses do believe that im up to it and that i would climb even higher than the other veteran supervisors. i just wouldn't want to create the green-eyed monster in some of them who may think that i am a threat. resentment which leads to enmity is defnitely not wat i seek for. absolutely NOT! i luv my colleagues....they are like a family to me.

though it's true i am more knowledgeable in many areas, especially concerning the IT, i would never look down on my colleagues...i respect them as who they are cos they have their own capabilities....i am even more than willing to impart my knowledge to them so they wouldn't be too dependent on me the whole time. that is what i wanna work towards. the only reason that i have info on practically everything in the company at the tips of my fingers is that i self-initiate. always curious and ask questions and analyse problems by myself or discuss with others and resolve them promptly. then from being stupid and clueless, i learn and eventually master in those areas and i improve.....from all aspects of the operations...i mean, i have no excuse not to know anything after being in the company for more than 7 years, do i? so, as for now i am giving my best shot for the betterment of the company which leads to the economy of the country...
*wink* ++ good speech, viv! ++ haha! ten points for me!

anyway, thanks for reading my blog people....i am gonna hit the sack soon. ciao......

//...luv completes me...//

!!!!HELP!!!!

2006-09-13T01:41:00.000+08:00

my wardrobe is expanding! look this is only 1/10th of my collections; mainly tops here as i have them organised by colors and categories....i mean apparels, of my own these are just a part of the few tops from camisoles, to re-vamped tanks and tees, capsleeves to puffsleeves to offshoulders to long sleeves and to sweaters....then skirts to quads, pants, jeans to dresses.....look at the uniform hangers....they are in whites...cool huh? got them from my boutique...do not take up so much space in the wardrobe, really pleasing to the eyes (as i lurve whites!) but my highly potential expansive storage for apparels (some are even with the tags on still!) will not have a home soon enuf! what do i do? i even have many folded ones that i seldom wear and also the extended rack outside my wardrobe is full to the extent of bending in the middle of the rack. im so gonna get another rack just so i could hang out my new shoppings....gosh! i am so gonna get a walk-in wardrobe when i get a place of my own, when i get married that is. mmm....though i have given away some of my clothes to my sisters, and some to charity....i am still left with a humongous portion of my room filled with colors from my clothes.....

this is one of my fave 3/4 cargo pants.....bought from zara last spring summer 2005. the zipper and certain parts has got teal blue trims. i have worn it umpteen times and people keep saying it is a nice pair of pants each time i have it on....especially when i tie the matching sash thingy and bow it on the right side of my waistband. from the hairstylists to the manicurists to other boutique owners and not forgetting my colleagues! each time i wear em, it's a head turner...and i am not makin it up at all....why would i? i have a great incomparable sense of fashion remember? eza has the same pair in choco not knowing i have it in white initially...she was envious of me with the white cos she got hers in europe. well, eza and i do have some similar tastes when it comes to dressing up except that i could look different at times depending on my moods...a variety of styles....i can be electro chic, english rock, feminine, flirty yet classy, sophisticated sexy or casual and sporty. if i were to be formal, i would go for clean cut. or with a slight touch of avant-garde, unique and different.

but this very pair of cargoes has been loose lately. is it just me or the waist is expanding? i could still fit in my guess jeans, all the levi's and miss sixty jeans which measure 25inches waist...i do not feel that i have lost any weight nor add on...well, maybe its really the waist that's gettin bigger huh?...do i alter it smaller? i dunno...cos there is a sash that could belt up my waist....*sighs* maybe i shall see if i have gained more pounds and i will be bale to have it back on. and the other fave is another zara white/green pinstripes kneelength pants with turnup cuffs. sha and sherrie said my butts look prominently sexy and perky in that pair of pants, cute that they keep staring at my bum the whole time....wow! that is a compliment, coming from 2 40-sumthings....i was blushin totally!

mmm...tomorrow i am gonna meet hunny for breakfast cos he is stayin at mandarin hotel with his company as the whole team is settin up for the bossini show at heeren and gotta work in the middle of the nite....it's for their convenience, to sleep for awhile and back in the early morning...after my breakfast with hunny i could continue with my sop and hunny will still be around town.

//...turning in now...im all smiles...//

'sop' day

2006-09-12T22:27:00.000+08:00

i started work early this morning...supposedly at 9am. but i reached at 9.30 instead...was still in my jeans and my puma green tee cos my official workin hour is 11am....niza, myself and sharon had to conclude all our SOPs (standard operating procedures)....especially before the bosses are back from their vacation. we are all stressed up especially when the big event on the 11th oct is comin up. our 'theatre' theme fashion show for the autumn winter collection is gonna be the most talked about show while the main buyers go on buying trip. quite nerve-wreckin actually...cos this time the 'team of supervisors' are on our own without the main buyers and the bosses. they are coming back only on either the following day, 12th oct or even if they could make it, it would be on the day of the the show itself. four of the supervisors, myself, denah, sha and gek together with niza will have the power to surprise and prove to the bosses that we are gonna be the capable ones running the most spectacular event of the year....

i am kinda anxious actually...the show has got to be a successful one. though its only for invitees who have the seats to attend our show, some other shoppers or tenants from other floors or the exterior of our show area would still be able to watch from afar (well, not that far acutally). just like the Spring Summer Show we had on 7th april 2006. it's the 'fruit of our labour'. 30days of preps for the 30mins show. pppheeeeewwww.......thats alot of effort and time being toiled in for that event. niza, sherrie and i were at the reception receiving the guests in our avant-garde 'marithe' dresses. glamourously, fashionably, undoubtedly chic and the most fairest ladies of our store! i am not kiddin! cute....at least we are what we are.....we didn't even have to try so hard to be where we were then....in fact, we are not the front line people but we have what it takes to welcome the guests and usher them in with our eloquence and presentable appearances....only the most fashionable people could understand where we are coming from...and no, no....we are not from the sales team but the ones behind the scenes....

alritie! enuf said.....i gotta continue with my SOP...

//...fashion show s.o.p, human resource s.o.p, inventory s.o.p....bla bla bla...//

office date

2006-09-10T23:41:00.000+08:00

last nite was the unusual saturday nite date we had. we met at his office as hunny had to finish up some of the drawings. he was the only one working and he started in the evening. in the day he just had his session of xbox games. so i bought dinner for us and i reached there at about 9pm. he wanted to eat hokkien mee and i bought myself carrot cake, its a bigger portion than usual so hunny could share with me.

hunny started eating it and he wasn't very pleased with his dinner. actually i wasn't too. it's kinda a big dissappointment. nevertheless we were both hungry, so we just ate but i had to give half of mine as hunny is even more hungry. he just had some of the carrot cake after his mee. so, dinner was unexpectedly bad...and apparently we just were feeling really tired especially after the friday nite..(er, early morning actually). i just had like 3.5 hours of sleep and had to be up and running again the whole of saturday. much to my surprise, i wasn't even sleepy but a lil' tired though.

to heighten the mood in the office, i turned the radio on from my moto e680 phone and switched to our choice station, class 95....if there were r&b tracks played, i'd switch to lush 99.5....created some enticement there....luv songs to lounge music...to chillout...office date...

so, as i was flipping thru some fashion magazines i took from the shelves behind his desk...i sat across him and at times we had flirty glances at each other...both frozen and the only part of our bodies that moved were our playful eyes. hunny would look at me flirtatiously from the corner of his eyes and it caused 'em to be enticing that i was allured to glimpse back at him. then came our seducing smiles.....shamelessly flirtatiously teasing one another....we had the urge for intimacy...it was kinda exciting and fun having to do this with my own fiance as if it was a newly found relationship all over again....we were alone in the office afterall....

pretty unusual as it may seem..but i had a great 3 hours 'office rendezvous' session with hunny. it's obvious our luv seems to grow even stronger everyday & anywhere we may be....hunny and i are just so fond of each other. at the moments when i least expected him to show his affection to me, there he was kissing me like a baybee (sniffin' my facial scent)....ain't i such a glorious little princess???

then we left his office at about 12.15am. hunny had me sent home by cab. i was literally beaming with joy on the way back home....

by the way, this is the old levi's jeans-turned-skirt that i re-fabricated it ala 'marithe' style. i did most of the putting together of the pieces and changed the look a lil here and there. removed the waistband to lower the waist, replaced one back pocket to patch it on the left side and added the centre piece with the remnants of my cropped cuffed denims and sew it pleated back and front. hunny said it was nicely done. such creativity and innovativity in me. i have another 'newly' designed skirt. very vintage yet with a touch of style....wat d'ya all think?

//...my saturday nite will never be the same without hunny...//
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Thank.God.Its.Friday

2006-09-10T14:56:00.000+08:00

i was not expecting to get up quite early on friday morning. cos i was in my 'luxurious' queen bed the whole of thursday cos i miss hanging out with my pillows accompanied by my 'baby' laptop. furthermore, i was to attend a meeting at 10am. then i looked through my wardrobe....thinking of what to wear. i was feeling cheery and elated and thanked God it's Friday...

so, i put on the yellow ed hardy tee with levi's 577 that i had bought 8 years ago...it's a size 25 and i'm still a 25" on the waist. though it's still wearable, it was lookin real washed off; kinda 'vintagey' look as i had worn it very frequent many years back...and now i wore it back again and i felt good, cos it looked extremely great as it matched the yellow top i was wearing...so then, i just quickly slipped on the orange 'birkies' (birkenstock sandals) and carry the vintage bronze bag i had always been comfy with...

at 9.30am...the mp3 message tone from my phone sounded off....
"nuthin i can tell u....u look good wen u wear it well...tng..tng..tng..tng..tng tng"
ready to wear by felix the housecat....it's an electro track...really loud i got startled...
the message said;
"luv, later at nite we meet up wif my bro, fai & yaya for dinner. malek's (hun's bro) birthday."
i was wearing the same tee as wat i wore last saturday when we had dinner with afai and yaya. so i told hun, i was already on the way to work cos hunny preferred me in the black ed hardy. so i had to have plan B before meeting up with them..i wanted to look different from last week. so, as soon as i knocked off from work, i was thinking of going back home to change. however, it was raining and i just didn't have the urge to go home anymore. and the meet up was supposed to be at 9.30pm...by the time i left paragon, it was already 8.40pm. so, i had a plan....i could go shop for a top and change into the new one...well, the best place was Tangs...i could use my Tangs CitiBank credit card. so i went up to the 3rd level as i thought of getting sumthin orangey to match my 'birkies'. i saw this nike orange tee with really nice designs on the back that had green animation prints at the bottom and green perforated lines ala stitching along the borders of the back...nike air in the front...i asked hunny and if only he could see me in that top at at that moment...

but he replied.....
"ur the fashionista. think ur taste is better. if its nice, u make a choice, hunny. its ur shopping afterall"...it made me smile...

i have been very confident of my choices in shopping. cos it totally matched my green sweater as well....it cost $39.90 but after my rebate it was $34..not too bad...so i got my top changed after purchase. i didn't realise it was already 9.35pm and i had to make my way to orchard point. then i called if hunny was on his way too. soon, he said. as he had some drawings to submit.

on the bus there, i texted yaya i would meet her at cuppage soon. but she wasn't aware of the dinner and that she was stil at work...feelin unvited she told me afai hadn't told her anything. i then asked hunny...he wasn't sure about yaya either. so, as i reached orchard point and saw afai and malek, i asked afai about yaya. true enuf afai was only about to inform her of the dinner. then i wished malek a "happy 24th birthday" he is the same age as afai, yaya and melina (their other cousin who by the way tagged along too). i was the oldest there, wow...but they said i do not look a single bit like a 29 year-old. mmm...made me smile yet again...

in about 10mins, hunny appeared...he said my top looked great...it was a tasteful choice. well, ive never been more right in my dressing. hun always says i dress very well. we then headed to cuppage to get seats. while waitin for mel and her friend, we ordered the food..i was pretty starving at that point of time maybe cos it was a cool weather. so we got 4 dishes and 6 plates of rice...the guys ordered booze while the gals green teas.

full as we were, we still had the cahnce to talk about hun's work...in betweens were their silly jokes. hunny told us to get a copy of the straits times and flip to the urban section on thursday, 14th sept. at the last page of urban will be his final touch on the advertisement design for bossini. they will be holding a show on saturday. ain't i proud of hunny? absolutely! he had been working hard for this advert thingy...even the preps. and now that the advert has been settled he is taking a breather for the time being. only to have the show running soon after....

the clock striked 12midnite and the birthday boy had planned to go for a 'karaoke' session with us....and we could also get yaya involved. it was a fun 3 hours of 'singing & screaming' and crazy moments....all of us were being ourselves especially hunny and mel. she was having a hell of a great voice even when she sang lying on the couch. my admiration turned to her. she laughed alot too. we just got comfy with one another...

so, it was time to end the session. the guy who was in charge of that few rooms had to remind us for the 3rd time before the boys stop singing and made full use of the time there. we left at 3.45am...soon after, everyone looked tired. while hunny and afai had coughs resulted from the over-enthusiasm from the singing...hunny took a bike ride home from malek while mel, yaya, afai and myself shared the same cab though we went to 4 diff places. by the time everyone got home it was already 4.30am....

i only turned in at 5am and before i closed my eyes, hunny texted me to see whether i had a great time. i replied i did have a hell-of-a-good time totally. and though they are all 5 years my junior, i cliqued with them instantaneously and vice versa....

we are lookin forward for more outings with them in the coming months...

//...i do not feel my age at all...//

my GORGEOUS babes....

2006-09-07T22:57:00.000+08:00

myself and eza...the glamour times...
in our miss sixty jeans??

awesomely gorgeous aren't they?
eza on the left, nazy right..my fair ladies!

decided to put up our photos....my album..

2006-09-07T22:37:00.000+08:00

silly hunny....he made me laugh numerously at mustafa

2006-09-07T22:27:00.000+08:00

ed hardy...RAWK....

2006-09-07T22:08:00.000+08:00

cool huh?

desperate measures...

2006-09-07T19:51:00.000+08:00

my offday again....*grins* just as i woke up, hunny was the first thing on my mind. i asked him if he was on the way to work, he was dreadin it..cos of that cocky guy. but he is ready to challenge him as i know hunny is smart enuf.

so i have been bummin around on my bed most of the time...blogging and chattin with eza. saw their comments on the "nazy in my dreams" entry. they were really sweet...i miss them lots. they have been really great even though we are so far apart....in 3 different continents....

eza is absolutely hilariously crayzee.....she just told me no more eekky puky stuff...grossing the hell out of her...hahaaa...she doesnt mean any harm...in fact, i think i am too mushy at times...but hey, hunny made me this way, he nurtured me to such mushiness phase and full of expressive statements....with all his overwhelming treatments towards me all these while...can't help it but to journalised my true feelings...and what i have been longing for. not only luv for my other half but also my gorgeous friends, family and also colleagues...missing the old times and the good days. im putting all my sincere thoughts at stake here.

whoever who may bump into my blog...they would come to realise that my blog is all about luv....well, maybe not all but mainly and some on fashion and minority on issues or problems i face daily. i am free to write what i want rite? as long as its not provocatively offensive to anyone....whatever i blog about are nuthing but the truth. there is not once that i make up any stories...

n now..im in need of help!!!!....to be honest i am really undergoin the 'serious guide to gaining weight' phase. if there are any books that could help me..i would definitely get it straight away. why is it so easy for my other siblings and family members to be so 'well endowed' in every part of their body? i even had a nick 'kudut' (as in skinny in malay) when i was very young. my granny and my aunts from my mum's side used to call me that. but they had stopped usin that nick on me eversince i had grown from a real active tomboy to a graceful young lady....heee...ok enuff.....

these are what i had today....

for late lunch...'so called' or snacks...
1 pack of kinder bueno and continuously with a dozen of chocs contaning full cream milk with choco powder all over them and some with almonds in em...from hunny....

for dinner...
2 packs of 'myojo' instant noodles - dry 'mee goreng' style with 2 fried eggs over it.
to add up, i prepared 2 strips of beef bacon, 2 strips of chicken bacon and 4 cheesey chicken sausages. and they were served with lots of mayonese.......yyyuummmyyy....
to complete a very fattening dinner, i had a big mug of coke...and no, not diet coke, not coke light but yes....the original coke flavour!

for supper....
maybe im gonna buy cookies and cream ice-cream after this and continue with the cheese sausages which i left for my next round of my anticipated hunger pang....before i go to bed...

now, if i do this everyday, i mean not eating instant noodles..but discipline myself with 3 meals a day...(today i have 3 meals but no breakfast so i brought forward to supper) with all the fatty contents and calories, will i be able to gain weight? i've been working hard but to no avail....

***sighs***

thing is, now i feel like clearing my bowels. somehow, i always have very high metabolism rate in my digestive system i can't avoid. wherever i may be...my schoolmates, colleagues and friends are immune to my visiting the toilets after a hefty meal...im not kiddin! and why are my other sisters even before getting married they were already on the overweight side? though there are some saying that after marriage i will put on...much more than i wanted to.....thru the phase of post marriage life. is that a myth? cos maybe i have different genes from my other siblings? i really dunno...maybe i will never grow fatter than i am now. maybe i will have a body change when i give birth? maybe, maybe, maybe.....

well....from now i should just eat then sleep....and if i feel guilty, i would continue with my morning workouts so my abs will remain formed....and my butt stays firmed....i told hunny maybe my arms are growing slightly bigger...well, after careful examination he just shook his head in disagreement.....then i got tickled on my sensitive parts of my body...hunny was making fun of me...but he said just take more proteins and vitamins...i already done all that....what more do i do? he also said that it would be easier too if im more fleshy so i could easily deliver my future baby....tell me, how? anyone?

i happened to search for 'how to gain weight quick and easy' from google..and i found these:

So, to put it as simply as possible, there are 5 simple steps to how to gain weight, and here they are:

1) Count how many calories you eat in a normal day. Don't change anything, just eat like you normally would and count how many calories you consumed. This is an extremely important step, so try to be as exact as possible. Also, weigh yourself.

2) Starting the day after you counted calories, eat 500 calories MORE then you normally do. So, lets pretend that the day you counted calories you counted 2000. For the rest of the week, you would now eat 2500 calories a day. Instead of eating 3 big meals a day or eating all day all the time, spread those calories out over 5-6 smaller meals. Eat one meal every 2 and a half to 3 hours. To get big, you have to eat big! Remember that.

3) Weightlifting! Get in the gym and lift! This is another important step to how to gain weight, so make sure you are doing it correctly. For more information on weightlifting workout routines and splits, read the workout routines and splits section.

4) At the end of that week, weigh yourself. You'll notice you're gaining just after one week! Now, don't expect to see a 10lb increase. Gaining anymore then 1 or 2 pounds a week is unhealthy and means you're putting on way to much fat. So look for 1 or 2 pound gains at the end of the week. Don't sound like much? You can be gaining 5-8 pounds a month!

5) Heres an important one. At some point, you will stop seeing weight gain. At this point, you will have to eat even more. So, when you stop gaining for at least 2 weeks, it means it is time to start eating an extra 250 calories a day. Every time you see you haven't gained weight for at least 2 weeks, add an extra 250 calories.

More tips for how to gain weight (extremely important!)

- Stay away from bad fat! Even though weight gain is your goal, you don't want to be gaining fat and eating junk. Get rid of the chips and candy. No more fast food, nothing fried. Stick to high protein, low (saturated) fat foods like tuna fish (and other seafood), chicken breast, turkey, lean meats, rice, pasta, fruits and vegetables, nuts, flax seed oil, etc. (For more information, go here: Diet Plans And Diets)

- Track your progress! Weighing yourself once a week is extremely important, but so is figuring out if the weight you are gaining is muscle or fat. In order to know this information, you need to also track your body fat percentage!

- WATER! Drink water! Drink around a half gallon a day, more if you can. Yes that's a lot of water, but it's that water that will give you the energy you need to gain that weight!

- Sleep! YES! Sleep! The easiest, yet most over looked step. Get at least 8 hours of sleep a night. You're gonna need it!

Now the concern some people have about how to gain weight, is how to do it without putting on extra fat. Let me tell you how, YOU CAN'T! Unless you are using steroids, it is basically impossible to gain weight without putting on a little bit of extra fat. But hey, you want to see some weight gain right? Well then who cares about the little bit of extra fat you might put on while gaining. You will be able to burn that off later on, right now gaining is your main concern, so that is all you need to worry about.

thing is, ive done most of these.....and everytime i weigh myself its either i gain 1kg or lose 1kg...didn't budge much from 47 to 48 kg.....and i'm 1.68m...totally underweight!

***sighs*** again..........

//...tell me something different please...any coments?? anyone??...//
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nazy in my dreams

2006-09-07T13:17:00.000+08:00

i dreamt of naz twice...before my birthday and after. the first dream was she got on a cruise with B and the cruise stopover at Jakrta and Singapore. she had her hair cut short like mine...straight down till chin length. she was looking really gorgeous in her lilac outfits (couldn't remember if it was a dress) and her beautiful smile. she waited for me in a restaurant...as i arrived she gave me a huge long beary hug like she would never want to let go. we missed each other. she hadn't come home since january this year. for eza at least she took time off during her summer vacation in july-aug. so then, we chat and dine and trying to catch-up with our lives....still in my dream....rite after dinner she gave me a pressie for my birthday (that was before my birthday n i didn't know what she had sent me in reality from london)i couldnt guess what was in the package but i wanted to open it outside the restaurant...upon receiving the pressie, she walked me out of the restaurant and that was the end of the first dream...mmmm....little that i know on my birthday itself i received a bouquet of flowers from her and eza. luvly yellow rosses...as they know my fave colors are yellow and orange.

then, in the second dream after my actual birthday.....it was as if the continuity of the first dream..she held my hand and all of a sudden there was this musical playing in the background...a beautiful symphony...she wanted us to dance in the Rain! so we did....that place looked very familiar...just like the exterior of the restaurant in the first dream....we danced in the rain enjoying every single minute together....just the music, rain and us. such beautiful moment...i will never forget that dream. it was so overwhelmingly magical......i wished that dream never ended but it did...and i was late for work after that.

what are the meanings of those dreams? maybe i missed her too much. and eza too. though i didn't dream of eza but she is still close to my heart. as for sue, she is now expecting so i couldnt meet her often too even when she is in singapore. all i could do now is pray for them to be well always and wait for our next hooking up session. during 'syawal' (festive month after 30 days of 'ramadhan' which we have to fast) perhaps?

all's well ends well. for all 4 of us.....i got to know all 3 of them after hunny introduced his 'JI' friends to me...eza, nazy and sue. we were still in our teens or rather in our tertiary back then. i was 19? then we lost contact cos hunny did not want to hang out with em for fear that i would turn astray cos they were befriending more of caucasians than locals especially eza and nazy. but defying him, i contacted them back and hung out with em without hunny...the first one i got close with was eza. she was having problems in her relationship and confided in me about practically everything...so i did too. then slowly we grew fond of each other and she was my best friend....hanging out with her got me closer to nazy and sue too. we are now like sisters. though sue is now married she would always be there whenever we need her......but i wouldn't want to disturb her rest as she hasn't been feeling well during the early months of her pregnancy.

well, then now that i know eza is graduating from her OZ design school and nazy ending her london job contract at the end of the year....i can't wait to have a get-together but this time most prolly visiting sue at her mum's place in bukit batok more often...we are gonna be her child's godmummies.......hahaa...im all excited for her. she is finally going thru the moments she had been waiting for a very long time like, 2 years in her marriage? to be a mother to her hubby's child.....it's every woman's wish...i suppose.

if only i could be there for her all the time..i wish i could but i can't as i am always very busy in the day till 9 or 10pm...by then she would be too tired to move about.

she is now in her 4th month....everything is just gonna be fine...with God watching over her always....and nazy and eza....

i luv u guys very much...from the deepest corner of my heart.

the thought of u guys will never cease from my mind.....trust me on this....i miss u all!

//...now am gonna try to make full use of my offday now...//

conspicuous affections

2006-09-07T02:21:00.000+08:00

hunny was at GUCCI paragon since 7am yesterday. i called him to see if he could make it cos it was 7am sharp the moment i called him. he said he was on a cab there already. rite after hanging up the call, i went back to sleep though i know i could have woken up too....

then i got up at 8am then showered and got dressed. i didn't have to try hard to impress him...cos he's already impressed with the way i dress up all the time...he said i dress very well always...i was just in my zara yellow capsleeves tee that has metallic bright colored fonts printed inside out...and guess jeans that's washed off cos i did it on purpose to look real grungy but in a hygienic way that is....to complete, i looped an orange pony hair leather belt i got from my boutique (made in france). what i luv about my whole outfit is i could just pick out my orange birkenstocks my girlfrens got me on my birthday last year....i look fabulously modish.......and yet very comfy in wateva ensemble i came up with, impromptu...it took me half an hour get ready after half an hour of shower....

then at 9am i left home to go to work...hoping i'd be in time to see hunny at gucci boutique. i suppose it was just a wishful thinking...but i actually did see his shadow while i was passin by the boutique. he was in full black; black shirt and black pants with white and black pumas. so i just walked up to my workplace.

then in the afternoon, i went to the level one ladies' private toilet. i saw the f & b crew doin some preps for the show. then i thought i'd just pop by again even if to see luv from afar. to my surprise...as i walked out of the toilet and heading towards the old paragon atrium, i saw hunny standing rite in front of dunhill store as if waiting for me to appear...i did appear before him! we just had this strong telepathy...he is lookin straight into my direction as i walked to him... i saw his tired face though he flashed me a smile. then as one model from gucci walked pass, hunny gave a nod to him and turned back his attention to me. i was delighted....he had simply worked hard for all the events....and its all for us...so we exchanged some 10minutes 'stress relief' vibes. anyone who walked pass us could see the conspicuous affection for each other......and i asked if he would have time to lunchie with me...he said maybe not, regretfully. then i thought ok, we do dinner after work then. shortly after, i left him to continue with his work...

during my lunch time, i went down again around 4.00pm. the 1st show was already over by then and i saw 2 male models standing outside the store to usher guests in and out. but hunny was not there. then i walked to the escalator to go up to 2nd level. before i could do that, some tall guy walked up to me..."hey"....i turned around and saw Arme. he is my ex-schoolmate in secondary school.

we used to hang out with our 'gang' that was about 15years ago. we had the gang from sec three to our 'O' levels in sec five; those were the days in yusof ishak. we were the notorious kids...especially 4 of us gals (ju, rima, rahimah & me) with all the whole of 8 boys (raffe, rizal, arme, jumary, shamsuri, ahmad (aka ahsiao), fendy and khalid) i've forgotten some other names as they come and go, not stucked with us all the time. i remembered vividly how the gals were scolded by Cikgu Hazis for hanging out with the boys especially during the 'O's. we got too close that whatever we did everyone else in the gang would stand up for each other. but the gals, especially me, defied all the warnings and scoldings...we turned a deaf ear. i even had to go in and out of the principal's office and disciplinary master's office. having said that, i did not neglect my studies and i was one of the 3 in the gang who excelled in our 'O's and went thru polytechinic courses....

now, most of them are married...the gals especially. left with raffe, rizal and ahsiao. but arme asked me "are u married?" i replied "soon.." he asked again, "when?" i replied, "next year."

"oh ok, its same for me too. i will invite u wen the time comes...anyway we worked nearby..." he is working in zegna by the way. then i said, "yea, ok...will do..." then we parted and went back to our work. hhmmm...arme should be 30 now cos he is actually a repeat student from sec 3. and eversince then he joined our 'gang'. from boys to men....from gals to women....all have gone their sepreate ways....

wow...time really flies....and now that im 29, the consciousness is heightening in me....but that won't affect me much though i know i'm gonna be busy to even start a family yet even after marriage....people will say, once u r above 30, the probability to get pregnant is very low. i do not believe that. hunny said we do not have to plan anything....let nature take its course. but i would luv to spend 'singlehood' after marriage too...i mean, we will still be dating like we are doing now...but just that we are legal to live in the same household. we are thinking of getting a place near his workplace. wherever it may be. in the east most likely....

well, then later at 9, i knocked off and texted hunny watime he would finish. he said very late. and asked where i was. i said still at paragon. then i went down and tried to call him....i walked slowly to the gucci boutique and lookin out for him. he answered my call....askin where exactly i was. i said outside gucci...then we talked on the phone, the glass entrance door being the seperator between 2 souls in luv who were whispering luv notes to each other thru our phones....he walked near the door while i was watching him getting near the door....he said he couldn't leave the boutique as he was busy...then i said ok....i shall go home alone then. he flashed his cute wide smile at the door and it just melted me....my heart pounding erratically...i just got excited all over again...its true feelings i have for him and for no one else but him alone. he murmured 'luv u' before i left....gives me the rush thru my whole system each time he says that.

i miss him already....his sweet caresses.....the scent of his body...his singing to me affectionately, his warm osculations all over my face....aaahhh...i just want him by my side now. its such an amazingly awesome feelings..what we have for each other....it will never conk out on us....its such a wonderful passion.......we have a soft spot for one another....

at 10.30pm, hunny said they were having a meal at swensens and it was their first meal of the day. hun has always have the desire for food...and when he is hungry, he is angry....Thank God that he kept his cool till the event was over. all he needed to do was talk to me to and he would feel better. cos im his support and whatever he does, he consulted me beforehand. and when things happened, he asked me if he should go ahead with the things he wanted to do. i would give him my honest opinions but i told him i leave it up to his head to think wat the best solutions are. all i can do is support him from behind....whatever knowledge i have through my experience i would impart to him and vice versa....

yeah, now hunny is already home and he spelt out his unhappiness about the whole thing...i listened, i analysed and i understood....he is suffering now, from his long working hours and the cocky 'colleague to be' who is gonna join his company soon. hunny was smart enuf not to show his true colours in front of everyone else. but he has his own moves to outdo his contender.

i hope everything is going well, i wish hunny all the best. right now i'm still gonna wait for his next plan.

//...this is by far the longest entry i had done...//
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sheeshhh....some lunatic loser again...

2006-09-06T23:51:00.000+08:00

i got a comment from some loser from my last blog entry...

it says
"shut up. your ugly and your marriage will fail. there's no need to rebuke me. i'll not drop by again."

it was awfully nasty yea, but i dun let it affect me. cos those are absolutely not true.....mean, some people may say. n i am thinking maybe that loser has issues of his/her own...insecurities, low self esteem, dark secrets, bein deprived of luv...poor him/her....well, it's simply idiotic for someone to past comments like that even without knowing me at all? sssheeesshh.......

//...tables are turned back on him or her...//

half day MC...i need my 'drug'...

2006-09-05T23:25:00.000+08:00

i was feelin dizzy this morning when i got up from the bed..in fact, at 5 am i woke up and texted hunny...my throat burnin...my head spinnin..my nose stuffy....it was pouring then, i was wishin he was with me then. comfortin me and singin songs til i sleep.

last nite i was already quite sickly...met hun at harbourfront to have dinner. he was on MC and took his tees that were printed with our own designs...

so, at arn 9.30am i told hunny i mite go to the doc's once i got to work. he thought i would have gone first thing in the morning before work. i told him i will do that after the rest of my staff had come in. i wish he could come with me. being the independent woman that i am, i was strong enuf to go thru dis alone. cos i know hunny had been accompanying me these days just in case he would be busy with work later this week.

so, wen i got to my office, i didn't change to my uni. i was still in my nike brown velour sweater over my agnes b tee (its gorgeous, i tell u!) and my zara quads...and oh, i started the trend of wearing the bermudas denims months ago before everyone else does...i got it from zara way back in feb or march? at that time no one wears that kinda bermudas denim with pleats on the front yet. i bought it cos it was fabulous on me, niza was there when i tried for the 2nd time. sharon said it looked like marithe francois girbaud, very stylish..its a compliment..

and not only that, i had my relaxed levi's jeans cut into cuffed kneelength denims. it was such a creative one...innovative as sharon and niza put it. i always do change my clothes each time i get bored with their looks. and every now and then i would mix and match them my own ways, my own style....but i couldn't believe i'm still a 25 in waist? i have been working out and my abs has been firmed and i thought i had gained weight too! but HELL NO!! i'm still as slim as ever....

ok, where was i? i talked about my gettin MC ya...so, while waiting for my other staff to come in, i was shivering as the air-conditioning at my workplace was dreadfully low...18degrees celcius. GOSH! it was not a surprise anyone else would get sick besides me. then i left at 11.15am. wen i got to the clinic at raffles hotel, it was 11.35am. i took a new booklet for my company as i was in-charge of HR.

so i told the new doc, the normal shit stuff with my runny nose down to my heaty throat and also my migraine. she was the only doc who did the 'press-on-my-face' therapy to see if i feel any distinct pain. my facial joints were tested. i did feel some pains, especially on the left side under my eye and also the left forehead...ive never experienced this kinda check before...but im pleased with her thorough check on me....that explains my migraines which always start form the left side. so she gave me an MC, but i gotta go back to work to finish some stuff. before i took the train back to my office, i dropped by agnes b store at raffles city to see the bag hunny is gonna get me...nice...and the shoes awww...luvly! hunny promised me by end of the month...can't wait. he already bought me GAS tee, agnes b tee and also a designer statement tee, all in whites....a few more shopping were some miscellaneous ones...then as i browse through the racks in agnes b store, i saw my tee! the one i was actually wearing...so i asked em if they came in other color besides white. no, was the reply. then i headed back to my workplace....by the time i got to the office, it was 12.35pm and i continued with mass mailing lists....i did a couple of updates to my database and hunny called me..the first time. asking me to go home..i told him in awhile...but he said now...i said ok, i will message him.

then in half an hour time, he called my workplace 2nd time to check on me if i had gone back...i was still there...and he wanted me home there and then...in the morning hunny already asked me to go home straight away. but being stubborn as i am, i stayed till about 2.45pm...

while walking to the bustop, i felt my head throbbing and my eyes were all watery and reddish...nose drippin and body weakening....i needed hun there with me, felt vulnerable and weak....and in need of his warm embrace that would put me to sleep....he's my 'drug'...my antidote, my remedy, my counterpain. he's got the prescription to my getting well again. but i managed to pull myself thru the day alone in my room....it was 4pm when i got home and all i could do was lie down on my bed...trying to close my eyes....sleep, i did not. so i went online...to check on blogs.....hunny was at home all the way on his xbox...he needed that, to rest his tired mind...get it re-stimulated. i hadn't got the appettite to eat...but ive got my meds to take. so i just had 2 packs of Kinder Buenos...my fave choc wafer with smooth cream of hazelnut in it....mmm....hunny bought for me a box of 3's. i had 2 already. then i took the antibiotics and the cough medicine...i felt a lil drowsy, stoned... but still couldn't sleep.

then hunny texted me saying he's gonna b at paragon the whole day tomorrow...wow! i will have a chance to lunchie with him or even go home together...yay!!..heheees...look at me!.
i'm like a teenager who is excited to meet her newly found bf from school....like sha mentioned to me i was like a baby wen i got all excited...especially when i didn't get the choc muffins my staff supposed to buy for me yesterday...but nevermind, i will get them tomorrow..and hunny could share with me too....yippee...he's gonna be the at the setup for GUCCI event at paragon. so i assume he will be busy, that's for sure. as long as i could just get his warm kisses on my forehead, i will be appeased....my baybee fiance, is doin gucci show? wow.....

so now, i think im gonna have sumthing to eat, take my meds and off to my dreamland...on my cosy, comfy, cooly bed.....

//...till i see hunny tomorrow...//

quality time spent

2006-09-04T23:24:00.000+08:00

so last nite i left hun's office at 1am..as hunny had finished his drawings by then. he asked if we should go for supper but i told him just go straight back home. then he got a cab for me...kissed me goodnite and i left him to get another cab.

3mins later he texted me:
"thanks for accompanyin me hunny. u kept me in control of my work. i felt less stressed out."

i replied:
"it's always been my pleasure luv. as long as i can be a support to u...im more than willing to be there for u..."

again, touchin my heart, he said:
"if only u could be by my side all the time."

then i told him i wish for that too...it's just a matter of time. we will be there for each other physically and mentally....even a day apart makes us restless and we just need to see each other. not that i can't do anything without him around but he is always on my mind no matter what i do. and he would always ask me what i am doin and that he is happy i am his future wife. nuthin is gonna be easy if im not by his side....we truly belong to each other...

aaawww....real mushy?

alrite. now i shall talk about today. hun got MC today and tomorrow as his eyes got burnt out. then he was quite happy to stay home for awhile...and that we could meet up. so after work i met him at harbour front to have dinner together with him. he looked kinda fresh and pleased as he had his new tees that he had printed out with the designs we got together. 5 new tees...all in white...i luv him in white cos i luv white myself too...he has always been in black tees most of the time. its about time to change to white now...at least he knows he would look more stylish in them....fashionable as i call it.

i wasn't feeling too well and he caressed my head like he would a baby. and his warm kisses that gave me the fuzzy feelin. then we had dinner, hiswas not as satisfyin as mine...so after dinner he sent me home....we had a couple of games played from his Nokia mobile phone N72...had fun, challenges....

well, then he texted me after fetching me home..."if only we stay together"
that time will come soon and before we know it, we mite be growing old together too...

its a destiny for us both...we are soooo perfect together. to anyone who thinks that we may not make it till marriage, we have already proven u wrong. this blog is truly dedicated to all of u who believes in us. i have no regrets to whatever that had happenned as things do happen for a reason....and the good blessing is always hidden behind it. a beautiful anology i have always believed in.

//...i need his pampering wen im feelin sick...//

seafood steamboat buffet, anyone?

2006-09-03T22:06:00.000+08:00

**lunchie

yesterday was my offday...so i spent the whole day with hunny.....left my place at about 1.30pm, took a cab down and reached his place at 2pm. hunny was just up from his sleep yet again. his brother was home playin xbox...his parents to JB. then in the kitchen, hunny took out the chicken and beef bacon we bought from mustafa the nite before to thaw em and prepare for us...a healthy light lunch...with lots of cheese and mayo. mmmm....yyyuummmyyy....i luv it actually. hunny simply luvs to feed me. and i simply luv the attention...

**designers

then we talked about the designs he was gonna print for his tees. i brought the laptop so he could continue with my ideas and do some other design works....i had some graphics downloaded from the electro sites that i thought he mite be interested in...as he said i would be doin a 'project wan-way' challenge for him. so, i found the nicest and coolest designs afterall....he just edited the background thru photoshop and freehand. he was lookin pretty stressed out as he's workin under pressure...to make it in time before the printing shop at queensway closes. then he got 5 designs and we made it to queensway at 7pm.

but hunny could only collect his tees on monday nite....

**news

so we walked around as hunny wanted to get me a pair of shoes...i needed a white pair. but couldn't find anything that i like. after hopping from one store to another, i turned around to the entrance of the shoe store only to see naz & zam, the soon-to-be-married couple in december. they were also shopping around, for slippers....then abt 3 minutes into askin how-are-u-doin parts between the guys & gals seperately, we broke the news to them...hunny to naz and 2 seconds later me to zam...and we did it simultaneously having no idea the other had broken the news at all. so they were happy for us cos they thought we still had not planned anything yet.

yea, they got engaged in november last year....and now it's our turn. they had been our support and i admire them for being able to get married before us cos their plan was initially in 2007. it's nice to hear them getting hitched finally too....though zam is 5years younger than me. they have been very luvin towards one another...each time i saw them.

then naz was like asking 'she cut her hair?' zam quickly replied 'what a question...' and laughed...i turned back at them and smiled...so, then we walked together to other shops and in the next 10minutes, we had to leave them and make a move to meet yaya & afai. it was already 8pm. before leaving queensway, hunny managed to get 3 more xbox games at a good price..in all he had 4 new ones yesterday. he was smiling from ear to ear after the purchase.

then we left to cityhall as yaya planned to watch movies at marina, 'monster house'. or 'barnyard'...much to our dissappointment, the only next available slot was at 12midnite. it was already 9pm as we had to decide whether or not to watch at other cinemas. hunny wanted to dine out first at the middle east & western restaurant we went to on my birthday, 'amirah'. then the 4 of us took bus to arab street.

**changes

suppossedly, the plan was to play bowling at marina south after dinner. yaya suggested we have our dinner at marina's seafood steamboat buffet place there instead. cos we did not even order anything from the mid east restaurant (amirah's) though already seated...

we then took cab to marina south...by the time we reached there it was about 10pm....quite a big feast we had for a $12 bill each pax. its really a quality buffet....we had fun with all the food we barbequed and the seafood that was cooked in chicken soup steamboat. hunny had his full utilisation of his $12 bill...he got most crabs and prawns...they were more than worth it. he paid for all of us, feeling contented and satisfied.....then we had almost 4 hour of dinner and jokes and laughter together...the bond we shared, was tremendous....the age difference did not hinder us to get along so well....the 4 of us were pleased with our meal....nuthing more worth it than what we had...i luv the pepper chicken bbq. so did yaya...

then bowling was not in our list after seeing the game arcade. i wasn't feeling too good after dinner...sumthing just felt not rite...i felt nauseated. then i went to the toilet, painstakingly bearing with the condition of the toilet while trying hard not to throw up. it was first day of my period. i hadn't felt like this for so long...after leaving the toilet, my whole body felt weak...the left part of my body was shivering. hunny asked me to play some games, but i didn't have the mood and concentration at all....then i had migraine.....aarrgghh...i hate that feeling.

hunny stroked me on the head and gently touched me asking how i was feeling...i felt lethargic. maybe i was tired, maybe coz i had my cramps. so at 2.40am we left for home. hunny left me in the hands of yaya and afai as yaya just stays around my block and that afai was staying over at her place. we took a cab back home. dropped hunny off at the main road of marina.

**uneasy

hunny messaged me "u ok sweetie? text me wen ur home k" i just rested my head during the cab journey. it was still very nauseating as i felt that its stucked and making me feelin uneasy. so, about 3.10am i reached home and hunny asked if i was back already, just to make sure. yaya asked me to rest and sleep early. even she had to work at 9am on sundays. the minute i got into my room....i put my suff down and tried to let the puke out in the bathroom. its still stucked and then i gave up and went back to my room to try to sleep...after like 5mins into sleepin or it could be longer, i was awaken by the dream that i had..i got bumped by a car...then i messaged hunny. he said i was bein too paranoid after i told him to be extra careful goin to his office today cos somehow my dream would always turn out to be the opposite or happen to someone very dear to me......

**overtime

and now i am here with hunny at his office...he's working overtime just to finish his drawings for the events which are supposed to be submitted on monday morning. he is quite tired as it is and the computer is slowing down on him...

i hope everything is turning out fine and i could leave for home at 11pm..

//...whatever hunny does, its for me...//
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anniversary date

2006-09-02T10:08:00.000+08:00

hun messaged me in the morning to say he may end work early and dat he was gonna fetch me after work. i was surprised...thinking he was tired he still bothered to come and get me. so i waited for the day to end. each time there is sumthin good or bad goin on, he would wanna see me..sometimes just surprised me.

then at 8.45pm we met at mandarin hotel going to sharon's shop, SPLURGE....he would then meet JD and i could take a look at the bags Sharon is sellin for June (elder sister of Sharon). so, hunny was standing there at the foot of the escalators wearing a red tee lookin quite tired actually. then as usual, he gave me a kiss to start with. he said he saw niza and hubby who went to sharon's shop before us and left early.

then hunny told me he is buying me dinner...yea he's got his pay. then where to eat? mmm..i know he would luv beppu menkan japanese gourmet restaurant...so we went there to have a great nice dinner for our anniversary. hun had his beef ramen with 4 servings of chillies...salmon sashimi, shishamo and a black beer. while i had unagi rice, chawamushi, mayonese prawn and grapeade snapple...we were so full...i was so lazy to go anywhere else after that...then i felt sumthing was missing...it was my craving for ben & jerry ice cream...by then it was almost 10.30pm and ben & jerry store was already closed.

it was a mixed feelings of dissappointment but yet relieved cos i was not able to consume anything more after dinner. so we walked out of suntec. he held my hand and we strolled to the cosy seats between Tower 1 & Tower 2. it was a nice breeze out there. we talked about his work...i asked him how he was doin and all...then hunny felt that sumthin was not right with his tummy. i reckoned it was the over consumption of the chillies. and he wanted to look for a toilet at 11.30pm. we culdn't find any nearest ones, so we decided to take a cab down to mustafa...he luv the upper level toilets there...haha...its an excuse to shop more.

however, upon reaching there, hunny said he was already fine..but i told him he still he had to clear his bowels...so i waited at the hardware section for 15 minutes. there i felt a little tired and sleepy as its already midnite. then we shop for groceries...foodstuff and homeware just like any other married couples would. by the time we had our shopping done, it was already almost 3 in the morning.

then we headed back home. hunny looked really tired cos he had been out from 10am.

as soon as i got home, i organised all the groceries in the kitchen cabinets and the fridge then showered and went to sleep....hunny also turned in as soon as he showered..he said we could meet in the afternoon to go to COMEX at Expo.

//...yet another saturday rendezvous...//

feelin fabulous at twenty-nine

2006-08-30T23:35:00.000+08:00

*birthday.......

alas! i am twenty-nine. had a great birthday eve with my luv ones wishin me well and happiness. it started with hunny fetching me from work. he planned a nice nite for me. for my birthday, he took the days off. i feel so damn lucky here. hunny took me to nice western & middle east restaurant to dine out together. we were there for the first time. it was nice set-up, sumthin different from where we usually frequent. before we ordered anythin, my luv knowing me sooo well, gave me a whole box of chocolates. quite a big box. i wanted to share with him half of it but he let me have all of em...mmmm...luvly~

so then dinner for me was mixed kebab with arabic rice while hunny had lamb chop set meal. i had the privilege of choosing the dessert though...chocolate ice-cream of course. then we talked and planned what to do on my birthday. shop, yea....hunny will go shopping with me....

he had the whole nite planned for us. he had booked a place for us to get-away. so we stayed in this luvly place that no one could disturb us. quiet and fabulous rendezvous with nice ambience. i continued with my chocs and soon when it strike 12 midnite...he gave me a warm sweet kiss that would melt my whole body system to wish a nice nice birthday to spend with him.....

i luv him LOADS! with all my heart.

then half an hour later my sister texted me...followed by sue at 6.39 am, then an old friend of mine gave me well wishes at 7.35am. eza was the only one who called me...from OZ to personally wish me a happy birthday while i was still in bed at 10.35am. my married cousin sofie wished me always be pretty even at dis age (cos she's also 29) at 12.18 pm....

when i called my workplace, kay sang me a birthday song...i almost cried...then came a call form niza with a one liner song too. everyone very close and dear to me had been there for me when i was down and shared my happiness....I LUV THEM TOO...

the 8th person was naz the moment i saw a GORGEOUS BOUQUET OF YELLOW ROSES & LILIES...she even bothered to do that while she is in LONDON at this very moment. azman was the 9th person who texted me at 9.48pm...while i was admiring at the flowers the last person but definitely not the least, my chinese sis, surprised me too...joce..which says...

"EVERYONE wants to be e first. but i differ. let me b e last to end ur beautiful bdae. happy bdae! may all that u wish for happen.."

aaawww.....such sweet little words.....mean alot to me. then at work, ahsiao msn me while i was busy...about 6 - 7pm? by the time i wanted to thank him he was already offline...so just half an hour ago, he went online again and i thanked him.....at work, most of them wished me too....
mummy was the first to start my eve with great luv and she gave me 'ang pow' (red packet) for good luck....its soo nice of her..i didn't expect her to do that...it was impromptu....she just got to know of my birthday and before i left work, she got the 'ang pow' all prepared.

i am feelin sooooo lucky to have all the people who care so much for me...especially mummy whom i have been looking up to her as my own mother......she never fails to take care of me each time i am in trouble or sick or even feeling gloomy at work...

these people are the ones i would never live without....i am the happiest birthday gal at the moment....even though i know Michael Jackson also celebrates his birthday same day as me..

*shopping

so in the afternoon, hunny suggested to shop in JB where we could find one-offs at zipper. so we went ahead...then to F.O.S..i had a great shopping spree thanks to my luv! had 6 tops; white GAS, white agnes b, white johanne hildebrandt, yellow ed hardy, shirt, sweet couture green sweater and velour brown nike sweater.....hunny got himself another pair of levi's with 2 agnes b tees.....all for just below RM600....they are all worth the trip there...not many people know that shop sells really really good labels....

i luv my white and yellow tops...with my sweaters!

thank u LUV!

//...i am waiting for white agnes b sneakers from hunny...*wink)
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counting down the days

2006-08-26T23:29:00.000+08:00

hunny is finally getting his demands. well, he deserves it..he got advices from me...being in the HR department i have the answers that he needed...and i told him if he couldn't take the long hours abuse, get his claims, his rights. as working for more than 60 hours in 3 days straight is a fucking abuse to me. he had been dong a great job in the drawings and all and yet his boss couldn't be bothered with his welfare and health at all just so they could finish the deal with the other party. i am really agitated by that. knowing that there is only one staff that was working for them they were taking advantage of him just because he had been keeping silence.

and now, being his other half who has been working in fashion retail line and also entails HR and alot of organizing for shows, work behind the scenes, i told him to demand for his rights. so he got 2 off days which are the eve and my actual birthday just so he could spend a quality time with me to destress....he said i have been his brightest light in the darkness....always lead him to the right track. and things just turn out perfectly...the way it should be. aaww....i luv my baybee....

yea, this time around i suppose, the get-away will be a real splendrous one. i am not hoping for any materials....though i won't mind if he gets me the agnes b white sneakers to match my marithe francois girbaud white skirt. or even another pair of miss sixty jeans...(*wink) i suppose everyone whom i know especially my best friends...naz back in london and also eza in OZ have already delivered something for me to land in my home on that very day....mmmm wonder what it's gonna be this time. sumthin really fabulous OF COURSE! i know i could trust them to get what i like....well, well, as long as they have me in their hearts, whatever i receive, materials do not matter at all. i could get stuffs i like on my own or sometimes hunny would get for me. not a problem. we are already gettin married soon afterall. so we exchange gifts or more so he shop for me now. hehe...ain't i lucky, babes?? i know u guys really want me to be a happy bride...so here i am...

I AM GONNA BE A GORGEOUS, OUTSTANDING & FASHIONABLE BRIDE!!!

i am gonna break the typical traditions of the malay wedding culture...as ive mentioned...
my closest of the closest friends would be invited to a beach wedding party just so we could have it fashionably fun and relaxing with nice jazz and chilllout tunes to dance or even sway to...

mmm...ive got everything all planned, on My Wedding Planner.....

//...so, just stay tuned to my upcoming entries...//

meds by placebo...hun's dedication

2006-08-24T10:31:00.000+08:00

I was alone, Falling free,
Trying my best not to forget
What happened to us,
What happened to me,
What happened as I let it slip.

I was confused by the powers that be,
Forgetting names and faces.
Passersby were looking at me
As if they could erase it

Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?

I was alone,
Staring over the ledge,
Trying my best not to forget
All manner of joy
All manner of glee
And our one heroic pledge

How it mattered to us,
How it mattered to me,
And the consequences

I was confused,
By the birds and the bees
Forgetting if I meant it

Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?

And the Sex and the drugs and the complications
And the Sex and the drugs and the complications
And the Sex and the drugs and the complications
And the Sex and the drugs and the complications

Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?
Baby did you forget to take your meds?

I was alone,
Falling free,
Trying my best not to forget

//...hunny is burning out at this point of time...//

run by snow patrol...hun's song for me

2006-08-24T10:26:00.000+08:00

I'll sing it one last time for you,
Then we really have to go.
You've been the only thing that's right,
In all I've done.

And I can barely look at you,
But every single time I do,
I know we'll make it anywhere,
Away from here.

Light up,
Light up,
As if you have a choice.
Even if you cannot hear,
My voice,
I'll be right beside you dear.

Louder,
Louder,
And we'll run for our lives.
I can hardly speak i understand,
Why you can't raise your voice to say.

To think I might not see those eyes,
Makes it so hard not to cry.
And as we say our long goodbye,
I nearly do.

Light up,
Light up,
As if you have a choice.
Even if you cannot hear,
My voice,
I'll be right beside you dear.

Have heart,
My dear,
We're bound to be afraid.
Even if it's just a few days,
Making up for all this mess.

Light up,
Light up,
As if you have a choice.
Even if you cannot hear,
My voice,
I'll be right beside you dear....

//...he broke down to tears singing this song to me...//

"every nite i burn, every nite i call your name"

2006-08-24T01:21:00.000+08:00

*burn

read the title of this entry again....that's hun's liner on msn...dedicated to me. he has been working his ass off just so he could complete his tasks....3D drawings and ad layout for his next project. already a few nites that he had been working till the following morning and to get a couple of hours rest before heading back to the office...im so worried about his health. have been almost a month he hasn't been taking care of himself well...his body system might not take it anymore and he may fall sick if this continues.

although he has been committed....it's really quite an exploitation from his boss..they are understaff and yet he has to do the drawings in such short notice. not that hun doesn't enjoy it but he hasn't been sleeping for 8 full hours recently...each time he calls me from his office number in the middle of the nite...i would promptly wake up just so to make sure he is alrite. he would keep me informed of whether or not he would be staying in the office or back home.

so, i presume if he couldn't take it..he would call it a nite...took shower, had meals and crashed. i am just hoping for the coming event to be over or rather the bossini that has been takin a whole chunk of his time away from his family, me and sleep.

so now, tonite...he asked me if i could keep him company on msn the whole nite. i would do anything for him at this very moment when he needs me. he would be very glad to see me...my face online....so he could work the nite thru. he needs me, so i will be by his side throughout.

*funny

at work i did my daily responsibility as usual. then middle of the day i had to try on a gorgeous turquiose tafeta gown with ruched bottom...i lurve that very piece! it was like my dream wedding dress....my boss asked me to try it on for the tailor to take a better look on someone slim for them to revamp it. as usual, i was drownin in it but not that bad afterall...if it were to be my size, i would look real 'stunnin' as a bride...i guess i just need to gain a few more kilos?

next, as i was standin still in that dress in the tailors' workshop and my back was facing the door...the 2 tailors had to pin d dress so they could put on crystals on it. so, the next moment...the 'computer wizard' my boss hired was lookin for me to ask abt some IT matters on our company's system....and he went in the workshop to look for me...in 10 seconds, he asked niza and went like... "do u know where is vivi?" i heard him asking but cldn't turn arn to face the door...

then niza smiled and pointed at my direction with me in that piece of gown....

"oh..i couldn't recognise her from the back in that gown!" then in a split second there was a burst of laughters from my boss and the tailors and niza in the workshop! my gosh! i wouldn't want to be embarrased but it was really funny...my boss was like "HAHAHA! he was so funny!!!" she couldnt stop laughing for 5 minutes. they knew he was like a bit blurred wen my back was facing the door and then in next 5 10 minutes the whole workshop was really noise....

*match

well, i guess i really looked different in gorgeous outfits...no one would recognise me should i walk down the aisle in a wedding gown unless they were invitees. hun would b so proud to see his future wife lookin extraordinarily beautiful on our weddin day. i am proud of my good looking future hubby too. we are a great match huh?

*responsible

rite now as i am blogging, hunny is at his office still, his msn is on n we chat every hour or sumthing. his main aim is to earn for us, our future. he is enduring the lack of sleep just so he could finish his work. how responsible can he get? i mean, everyone is...but i am really overwhelmed by his commitment like never before...its very extreme. even i couldn't take staying up like dis to complete my work. i give hun my full respect for that.

*inseperable

apparently, we are inseperable and cannot do without one another...every week we only meet once and that makes our bond even stronger as we would badly need one another at times wen we feel down. then one of us wish that the other would be there to hold us tight and cuddle like a baby. he is my baybee and i am his.....

//...each time he hears my voice, he says he needs me...//

if only i coud turn back the clock for yesterday

2006-08-20T22:03:00.000+08:00

it was not quite a great nite....we were waitin for the time to meet last nite after hunny finished his work at the office....been waiting for so long..the whole week. he needed me...i needed his kisses....

however, while having dinner, we started to argue. hunny was lookin really moody. tired, he said. i was talking to him but just minimal responses from him. then we had a bad dinner.

after awhile...we apologised to each other while walkin to the bustop....we realised we could have been more tolerant to one another, so we made up. by that time it was quite late and we needed to get home. so much for quality time...wish we could have that time spent fight-free....

so, some regrets there....upset. it was the only nite of the week we should be more intimate but we spoilt it all.

however, nuthing is stopping us to be back to our luvin state. he still misses me n i still need his touches...

just gotta wait on the 29th ....YES! MY BIRTHDAY! its sure is gonna be a special one..

//...i am turning twenty-nine...//

home alone again

2006-08-18T19:09:00.000+08:00

last nite i slept very early, about 11.45pm...cos the nite before i stayed up till about 4.15am and woke up at about 7am. i did my work and had to be submitted during the Supervisor meeting on thursday morning.

so, having a good off day, i took advantage of sleepin in today. woke up at 9.30am, i saw hunny's message at 12.30am last nite. he just fnished his meal and read papers when i was already in bed. he was gonna turn in too at that time. then at 11am i went back to sleep til about 2pm.

last nite he did call me at my workplace. whenever he misses me he will always call even for a bit. just to hear my voice...after leaving his office at about 11pm, i received his text msg sayin:
"i miss u so much, luv.."

i miss him even more. in fact, each day that passes by my luv for him has been so deep. if he is exhausted and needs my pampering, he would say he needs my touches and soft kisses.....

knowing he is geting more and more valuable in the company, he said he will get another promotion....or rather re-position as "In house Graphics Designer". increment again...not bad for someone who dropped out of Multimedia Diploma course 4 years ago. he had been doing 3D drawings for his company for the past couple of weeks, self-taught....they had realised his potential is not only in clinching deals with clients, anxiously organising events and getting everything in place all by himself...but he is such an all-rounder. real smart fella.......my fiance....he is gonna have a bright future ahead, together with me. now i guess he will not be a happy person if there is nuthing for him to do. even on off days he worries about work....

at times, he seek solace and comfort from me if he is on the verge of breaking down. i will always be there for him....thinking back of what someone very dear to us had said...

sent by dawn to me on msn, march 16th 2006:

" i just always want him to be happy. and u are the most important factor in this equation. he confides in me alot and i will be blunt to him if i have to. i'm like the sister he never had."

that is enough assurance....he did mention that dawn is like a sister to him. i know dawn well too...we have been close...she is such a darling. been very supportive to us over the years.

she made me overcome the sad period.....besides joce and my other best friends...now i'm the most happiest woman in the world. even if its high chance i can't meet hunny today, i am really happy he is committed to his company. never before has he been so satisfied in his job.
Well Done, My Luv!

i will then continue with my work at home with my SOP and HR roster for the monthend and make the best of my time here alone without any disturbance.

//...tomorrow is our date i suppose....just have to wait...//

beautiful offspring...baby chevon

2006-08-18T09:34:00.000+08:00

|| date of birth: 13th aug 2006 || time of birth: 0949 hours || place of birth: thomson medical centre || type of birth: caesarean section ||

gigi had given birth to little bloomy chevon on sunday the 13th. we visited her on monday, at thomson medical centre, room 607 after work. she is such a cute little baby girl..with nice sexy lips and high rosy cheeks. and very healthy too...i suppose she would be as tall as her proud parents. mmm......we are glad finally gigi had now come to another step into motherhood. she is sure gonna be back to her figure as she go along trying to juggle baby-sitting and taking care of herself. has to go for a couple of lessons...breastfeeding and all...now she is also 'blooming'...

we gave gigi our hugs and best wishes before we left thomson...but that's not it. we are gonna visit her again once baby chevon is one month old and that all of us will visit her at her new place....her house warming. everyone is so elated she has got everything now....new spouse, new house, new car, new baby luv and the best of all, new stage in life.....

wen i saw the family of three, i see the bubble of strong luv between them. we really wish now that things will turn out fine for them too....we luv gigi so much we wouldn't want her to be sad or experiencing post-natal blues.

however, well done to everyone who (u know who u r) have made her a wonderful human being cos she really looks upon us as her best friends....and she is our little sister at work...

//...yet another marvelous event of the year...//

solicitude

2006-08-15T22:39:00.000+08:00

its a mad rush for me at work...as well as hunny. but he is now having some doubts about the whole project. he was afraid he screw it up. and his worst fears came to reality. he messaged me he is bracing to face the music. i am worried about him...i just can't sit back and do nuthing if he is feeling shitty about his efforts...what shall i do? all i can do now is hope that he could handle it as a proffessional. though i can't wait to hear from him to tell me what was going on. i wanna be there when he needs me...i wanna go through hell with him as much as i wanna be inside his heaven.

we have got to support one another in whatever we do...
anxious...troubled...distressed...

its almost 2 hours after he texted me the worrisome message. i am feeling the anxiety in me. what is exactly happening? is there any way he could salvage the situation?

//...am hoping and praying for the best...//

ecstatic...feelin wonderful at twenty-nine

2006-08-13T23:34:00.000+08:00

the biological clock is ticking...and yet i do not feel it at all...in the next 16days im turning 29?
mmm....people may say it's high time i get married but hey! it's my life isn't it? im getting married next year and next year it is...though i'm gonna be a wonderful, gorgeous and supportive wife to my luvly significant other...i still like the fact that we live away from one another and that distance make us grow fonder with each other...it's proven.

and now that hunny has been so wonderful to me and always informing me of where he will be even at work; on the run with meetings or in the office, he would say he needs me. i give him my full support...emotionally and mentally. i have total faith in him. his next event; a big project is next wednesday. he thought he was ill-prepared. but i could see he did his very level best in everything he does now. even makin efforts to make me happy....or his parents even. now that he is climbing high in his career too....he wouldn't want to exchange his life with anything else now. i feel the same...we never fail to give each other the assurance that we have done our best in our career....though there are still room for improvements....i am so proud of my hunny. so is hunny of me.

he has sumthing planned for me on my birthday. though he is not telling what its gonna be...i know its gonna be the most wonderful birthday of my life. as his fiancee.....as funny as it may seems but yea, we are engaged...

//...gotta pull out my wedding planner soon...so, babes just hang in there...//

wonderful day with my fiance

2006-08-12T23:26:00.000+08:00

finally another day with hunny after a real tiring week. hunny asked me to go over to his place first as he was still at the office preparing for next week's event. i left home at about 2.40pm and i reached eunos mrt at about 3.50pm. by that time hunny gave me a call from his office phone saying he was gonna finish soon and be home after me.

so 15mins later, i got up to his family's residence and waited for him. hun's mum asked me if i wanna eat without him. my answer was obvious; i would wait for him just like a luvly sweetheart would, waiting for her significant other to be back from work to have a meal together. as i was waiting for him, his brother and i were watching the encore telecast of the NDP Parade 2006 on channel 5.

it was already almost 5pm and hunny just texted me to ask me to hang on and that he is almost done. after another 30mins, i texted him back saying i was starving. and that i waited for him to come home. only at about quarter to 6 then he showed up at the door, looking really beat. i could see from his expression. this coming project really tire him out. but he is so committed i would give him my full support throughout. i do not mind seeing less of him as long as he is working smartly for us...for the future.

in the kitchen, he gave a slight stroke on my head and gently held me. then while eating, he stared at me saying i look nicer, cuter in this hairstyle. i had a white thin hairband which eza got for me from H&M...and another color is choco. so i made him fall for me all over again...after our meal, hun wanted to watch the fireworks which was happening at 9pm. but as we reached funan at 9.15pm, we missed the whole part of it...there was a real crowd around that area and those near boat quay. so we walked to the bus stop wanting to go to chinatown. hunny wanted to have something sweet like bread or cakes or something. however, looking at how crowded those places were, we decided to go home.

190 bus stop was just opposite the one we were sitting so its very convenient...furthermore hunny was really exhausted....so we sat at the back row of the bus for more privacy. we sunggled up with each other, exchanged sweet soft kisses on the cheeks, while playing games on his new phone...N72. he was so glad we chose that phone together...had i not insisted on that designer looking mobile phone he would ended up getting it changed yet again.

so, now hunny should be home. he gave me a message that made me smile...he likes the way i look and always getting younger and younger. i look good. we are really crazily in luv with each other. he thanked me for being his girlfriend, best friend, fiancee and future wife.

all i can say is we won't have enough of each other...never will. it's just a matter of time that everything will be turning out perfect for the both of us.....this is what we have been working on...spending the rest of our lives together....finally, our 11years and a half of 'roller coaster ride' did not come to a waste afterall.

//...it may sound mushy, but this is what we truly feel for one another...//

been quite awhile

2006-08-10T20:17:00.000+08:00

i hadn't got a chance to enter my blog for 3 days. cos the laptop was with hunny. he had to do some 'cleaning up' for me. however, he has not much time to do that and i had to do it myself. also to remove a whole bulk of video files out of it and to get it done and over with.

i haven't had any off since last friday, so saturday is the next rest day for me. hunny asked me to go over his place to meet my 'mum-in-law' and to return the trays used to give me the gifts on the 'special day'. i may be going in the morning and then hunny and i can go out for lunch or sumthin. then to the movies or perhaps just a chill out day at the cafe with yaya and afai?

we shall see...

//...till then...//

friday nite out

2006-08-07T15:05:00.000+08:00

hunny and i met at about 11pm on friday the 4th...its been almost one week...since we last met from the birthday celebration-cum-engagement day.

we met at bencoolen. i surprised him with my haircut. nice surprise. he likes it. cute. spunky. i missed my previous hairstyle. but it's still a much fresher look this time around. denah and gek said suits me better...with my personality. like korean or japanese kinda style. before, its like china doll hair...mmm....so i never look like any malay i suppose. which is good. i have fucking good taste...anyway, i always change my looks. can be versatile. miss kittin is my inspiration. but not exactly the same hair, mine is even shorter. hunny prefers me in this style too.

so we ate and drink. hunny had 2 bottles. after which we stayed out cos both were too tired. and we havent really had time to spend much time so that was it...we had the whole night to ourselves. the next day i had to start with the stockcheck at work in the afternoon. busy. hunny had an event on saturday nite. busy too.

last nite we had a family dinner together. at teck whye. after a long day at work. well, now its a little more work for me as things have changed a little. apart from my boss, i had to be the next to take charge in the logistics of the computer system. in order to make sure the stockcheck run smoothly.

yet another troubleshooting process....

//...work.work.work...//

twenty-five days to twenty-nine

2006-08-04T11:59:00.000+08:00

am turning 29 in twenty-five days...wow! but i still feel very young...and i look young and great too. i suppose other ladies my age are already becoming a mother of two or three even. why am i different, not married? i'm still career minded...and hunny is just reaching the highest peak of his career. but we are engaged now...so we are a step forward into moving to the marriage world.

having to start a family takes a lot of work and planning and thinking through. not just jump into it after being in a relationship for 6 months or 1 year or 2. only to know that u were deprived of freedom and luxury in the later part of your marriage, either of u...regrets, hates then break-ups...statistically, the highest percentage of broken marriages come from the malay society here in singapore. main cause of it? financial. its such a shame.

being a 'malay', i'm proud to say i am one of the different individuals...not those typicals who clung onto their partners and wishing and hoping their boyfriends would propose to them after meeting their parents for the first time. i am a liberal person...independent individual who maturely seek support from my luved ones only when neccessary. i have gone against the traditions, being in a relationship of 11 years and a half and only to get married next year. it takes years of luv and friendship, squabbling, bickering or even quarelling and getting to know one another even more from there.

i've vowed to get married only when i am ready...at the age of 30. only when both of us, hunny and i are ready. not when my parents or his parents ask us to. we are gonna be spending the rest of our lives with each other, not with either parents. i mean, of course family and parents mean alot to both of us but they do not dictate our lives...they should be supporting us in whatever we decide to do for ourselves. we are responsible for our own decisions and actions...no one is to blame anyone else but themselves should anything or go wrong with their own lives. we should be responsible enough to stand up for our own rights and live our own lives to the fullest. plan, make it happen and improve at any time possible. heck to all those who do not believe in us.

i'm not the perfect person or the one who knows everything about anything. but i do analyse, scheme and i do want to step up in the areas where i'm lacking in. its a fast moving pace at this age where we have to be savvy, vigilant and fructify. its what we are willing to do, not what others ask of u and you are obliged to do. total obligations can be harmful in the long run.

as we grow, we get wiser. its what i believe and anticipate. anything that evolves around you should not be limited to only what you have right now. we should set our own goals and aim far, further than your own comfort vicinity. then once we have achieved one goal, move to another and try walking out of the current proximity. try to get lost and find our way back again and try all over again...it will eventually attain to ur own wisdom. the satisfaction of an accomplishment is the best feeling. u will feel real proud of yourself. never give up. move forward and do not get apprehensive of what the future holds for you.

so, having said all that...yea i am excited to see what the future holds for me. cos we have been taking the efforts to get to where we are now. hunny is so proud of me as much as i am of him. our families have been supportive and now that they (our parents) have met up...they would not want to force anything on us. its all up to us to decide.

//...our very own lives...//

//

//

//

future hubby

2006-08-02T23:35:00.000+08:00

he's now still in the office. gotta finish up his 3D drawings for the future projects. now that his work terminal has been upgraded to LCD monitor, higher RAM and better graphics card. all paid by his boss. is she a cufking great boss or wat? now he's still working his way to complete drawings only after finishing one of the rehearsals. he is super workaholic now. nuthing else is more important than being a responsible event co-ordinator and enjoying his work at the same time.

11.33pm 02.08.2006

"what to do? your future husband is working for our future."

aaahhh....that's so nice to hear...

//...well, i can have many more good nites' sleep...//

the band for third finger

2006-08-01T22:54:00.000+08:00

it is loose...i am worried i might lose it if i wear it everyday. so i shall go to the goldsmith and get it fixed. to my size. it is a luvly ring w sparkling diamonds...well, after its done, im gonna b wearing it everyday i suppose.

//...feeling really special when i have it on...//

((eleven years and a half))

2006-08-01T01:08:00.000+08:00

its our anniversary yet again.

hunny said he's very career minded now...promoted, increment n job satisfaction. he earned it. this year he's made alot of smart moves he said. leaving d past behind...not takin just 'any' job...pursuing this events job and getting engaged to his sweet luv..me of course.

he said now career comes first in order to be a responsible husband to me...a good son to his parents and a wonderful future father to my kids. basically, he's matured tremendously and all grown up to a more responsible man.

//...we are so glad...//

...luvly...

2006-07-30T23:40:00.000+08:00

we celebrated his birthday with his cousin afai & afai's gf yaya. ya, they are back together. i anticipated it. hunny did not. i knew it all along. they r so cute together. we had drinks at esmirada, trying to catch up. we waited for hun's bro, malek. but we only met him when we had late supper at lau pa sat about 1am. we talked and laughed silly. fun. but was tired. well, maybe we could still hang out next week again with them.

today is the second day, being engaged...to d amazing luv of my life. its d start of our new chapter. as what is being planned, we are gonna get hitched next year, the earliest. a year n a half , the latest. dis time, its a definite confirmation.

//...one and only...//

13 hours to go...

2006-07-29T02:08:00.000+08:00

excited? yea we are....we are truly each others' motivation. hunny is now 28; older and wiser....

we totally deserve one another. its been so long and too much things had happened during these 11years of 'luv-hate' relationship?

alas! things are getting on the right track.

//...nuthing stands in our way...//

history of hunny's 'sms'

2006-07-25T00:22:00.000+08:00

*these are the history of his 'sms'es to me; been keepin em since my phone has a large memory

from the earliest (oct 2005) till the latest (july 2006)

9.12pm 03.10.2005

Baby, if any gal can stay wif a guy for ten long years, thru NS, thru pain, thru problems aft problems, even tho d guy feels nuthin abt himself...she's d one.

8.34pm 16.10.2005

Aft all these years, thru all the obstacles, problems, tests, ur still havin dat feelin? is it luv? y didn't u leave me, wen u had all the chances? Am i worth the risk? y r u still holdin on? u could haf someone betta, i know u won't b short of suitors. y me? u wanna know wat attracts me to u all over again? maybe i was blind all these yrs, but it was ur commitment, devotion, passion, faithfulness, loyalty, single-mindedness n ur undying luv showed me d way. ur my one...

10.43am 14.11.2005

i wanted to tell u, u looked beautiful last nite. definitely i feel so much in luv wif u over again, hunny.

03.37pm 20.11.2005

i'm tryin my best here, luv. n now dat i'm luvin u more den ever, i won't let up. i luv u more n more each day.

03.40pm 20.11.2005

i can say i'm really so in luv w u more den ever. dis is d peak. n im just startin to express myself more.

03.44pm 20.11.2005

i feel dat way too, sweetheart. without u i'm nuthin. it's not just a song, it speaks for me. 'placebo n bowie' knows about us i think, when they wrote d song.

03.02am 19.12.2005

Bbq, wine, champagne, music n u. these will make my new year. which i hope will b a betta one. cos dis yr has been bad.

10.33am 19.12.2005

lately i've been havin dashes of luv n bliss wen i'm wif u. at times u look wonderful to me.

10.32am 20.12.2005

i think i'm fallin deeper n deeper for u lately.

08.13am 23.12.2005

never been happier than dis. wat r we gonna do tonite hunny?

04.23pm 27.12.2005

is my sweetheart busy?

12.16am 22.01.2006

please dun say dis. its always been us against d world. it will always be. ur my other half i can't do without.

06.58am 22.01.2006

i can't sleep. i can't think. all i want is for us to b happier dis year. i'm so sorry for all d wrong i've done. i've been lookin forward to d day i get a good job, den my parents can come ask for ur hand. n dun care abt wat ppl wanna say. its always been us against d world. i luv u....

05.41pm 24.01.2006

next week mark our 11th year knowin each other. d good, d bad, d ugly sides. dats a lot of time. wat r we gonna do? r we gonna just throw it all away?

05.35pm 27.01.2006

also, u asked me to help u from tearin at d seams. i'm askin u to help me too, b d best u could ever ask for.

00.00am 01.02.2006

Happy Anniversary luv...

11.55pm 01.02.2006

cos i l luv u. simple.

10.33pm 03.02.2006

Baby, please! i want u...us...

10.35pm 03.02.2006

i swear i'm gonna treat u even betta den ever. i want to. hunny...

11.27pm 03.02.2006

no, hunny. i truly wanna change. for me, for u, for us. trust me.

12.10am 02.03.2006

luv it. luv u.

01.34am 02.03.2006

thanks for being in my life.

08.43pm 03.03.2006

be strong. look on e brighter side. i'll be supportin u....

11.18pm 03.03.2006

nite luv. i feel we will haf a bright future together. its all up to me.

01.32am 05.03.2006

my parents, family r gonna b e best u've seen, had. i know they r proud to hear my future in e company. even i myself didn't expect anythin like it.

10.50am 05.03.2006

d body clock startin to work again. maybe arn 3 i go. last nite i didn't even shower. land straight on d bed knockout. miss u baby.

11.05am 06.03.2006

hey luv. juz wanna tell u i luv u n i luv dis job. i'm gonna b very busy today n goin to pulau brani. dunno watime finish.

10.43pm 06.03.2006

luv u sweetie.

09.32am 09.03.2006

tired but i'm movin on. juz take it as outdoor gym workout. n wif d luv n support from u n my parents. i'm workin towards my goal.

09.17pm 10.03.2006

take care. miss u.

11.13am 12.03.2006

miss u sweetiee...

10.50pm 12.03.2006

i luv u hunny.

10.28am 19.03.2006

i'm sorry, sweetie. i know wat i did was wrong. i wasn't sensitive to ur feelings. i'll make it up to u tonite?

11.07pm 23.03.2006

hey baby sweetie, i juz got home. phone went dead aft lunch. dead beat today. watime u got home? nuthin? i miss u.

12.32am 24.03.2006

u sleepin oredi sweetie? i can't. too tired. i miss u luv. n i need ur pampering. dis 1 final week will b tough on me.

09.33pm 24.03.2006

hey sweetie, juz reached home. its so nice to hear ur voice even for a bit juz now. i miss u. i was on e verge of breakin till i heard ur voice.

10.02pm 24.03.2006

muz go to star wars ex. if i dun get to, my life is deemed meaningless. ends 3rd apr. tmr we haf to meet. if not, i'll die luv sick.

10.27pm 27.03.2006

soon we'll haf our own home. wif no disturbance watsoever. but i wanna be near my workplace. i dun mind havin my mum nearby.

12.19am 30.03.2006

our lives can only get better, sweetie luv.

07.41pm 03.04.2006

hunny, i luv u. i luv e way u win my heart over n over again. like changin ur look. u look so sweet wif dis hairstyle.

12.43pm 05.04.2006

i luv u hunny. very much.

12.33am 09.04.2006

got d bus. goodnite baby. luv u lots..

01.56am 09.04.2006

sorry to wake u luv. i'm so in luv wif u, so much. call me later. we'll go for breakfast. nite hunny.

07.06pm 10.04.2006

can we meet tonite? i want to feel motivated again.

09.05am 12.04.2006

hey baby. i'm at work. i haf lots of things to catch up. but im not motivated. remind me again y im doin dis. help me. push me.

16.04.2006

i really want us to be married soon, be happy. we haf been goin in d rite direction these past few months that we have started afresh.

01.23am 16.04.2006

Dear...u know how much i luv u? it's gotten back to d days our luv is so strong nuthin stands in our way?

01.26am 16.04.2006

luv pls...ur my motivation. pls dun wreck my heart. i'm already so deep in depression.

08.59am 16.04.2006

my luv for u is overwhelming. i notice it myself. it's juz true luv, nuthing else. my feelings have been true.

10.14am 16.04.2006

i'm not givin up on u. n i dun want u to.

10.08am 18.04.2006

wat is luv to me? U...having U.

10.56am 20.04.2006

hey luv. u still in bed? wat u doin today? i miss u.

11.05am 20.04.2006

hunny, i really miss u. i need u. u make me better in many ways.

02.23am 07.05.2006

dis is wat i wanna do. wat ive been envy of those ppl who work in events mgmt. its not much abt d glam, or wat, its pure satisfaction for ur hard work wen u c d events from scratch til d products to d end. to me its much more satisfying den anything.

02.35am 07.05.2006

dun worry, luv. wateva i do now its all for u. for us. @ last wif dis job, u can b proud of bein wif me.

01.01am 08.05.2006

gonna sleep hun. dis will mark d new life. to all those ppl who didn't believe in me, "Fuck U". i know u believe in me hun. we'll work hard towards our goal.

09.20pm 10.05.2006

yes luv, ive been showing arn ur pic to my colleagues. my sweetheart. they say u look sweet!

12.06am 11.05.2006

yeah i'm even so eager to show ur photos to my colleagues.

12.16am 11.05.2006

ur my forever...

10.14pm 23.05.2006

i miss ur long hair now.

12.34am 26.05.2006

am gonna sleep hunny bunny. luv u so much.

01.29am 30.05.2006

ok hunny, thanks. good nite sweet luv.

11.41pm 05.06.2006

we r so together...

10.49pm 16.06.2006

im sorry luv. im juz rushin for deadlines.

10.02am 22.06.2006

i think d shirts make me feel important. dedicated to my work.

12.27am 23.06.2006

surprisingly im not tired or sick of d job, d work, d meetings. i think for other jobs i'll be itching to go back early.

12.32am 23.06.2006

aren't u lucky? ur hunny is goin d rite direction finally, n becoming someone u can be proud of to tell. n very career minded now too.

12.34am 23.06.2006

its a win-win situation for us, hunny?

10.38pm 28.06.2006

m home sweetheart. i feel betta aft talkin to u abt my angst.

10.28am 29.06.2006

hey luv. new day, new post? we goin shopping sat?

11.30pm 01.07.2006

hey luv. it was a good day wasn't it?

11.22pm 11.07.2006

luv u more sweetie. take care. msg me once ur home.

10.03pm 12.07.2006

wats ur 3rd finger ring size hunny?

10.23pm 12.o7.2006

r u excited luv? we r finally reachin there...it's been so long.

10.44pm 12.07.2006

y dun u be my stylist? i want to bring out my inner side. black electro clash, electro chic. wat can u come up wif?

05.07pm 13.07.2006

haf to stay late at work today hun. got new proposal to do. new project.

09.59pm 14.07.2006

i luv u too. guess all d troubles we faced was worth it aft all. things r slowly goin our way. we r winning it all. btw my boss noticed my bag, n dat ive been lookin v good lately. i told her i cant look sloppy wen i meet clients. muz dress to impress.

11.27pm 17.07.2006

i want our own place, our own cat, our own kitchen, our own bed....our own haven...

12.07am 24.07.2006

will d special day make any difference? yes...we will be more luvin n understandin.

//...im keeping all these for my journal...sweet...//

seven quality hours

2006-07-23T11:28:00.000+08:00

we met at 8.50pm at cityhall last nite. i was a little tired actually but was delighted at the thought of meeting hunny. after a long week of hard work and not meeting, we deserve to be spending the whole nite out together....

so we went to the cd store at city hall and then towards HMV then to marina through citylink...we were supposed to watch 'pirates of the caribbean' last week already but everywhere was sold out. so we made our way to marina to book the tickets at 10pm...it was a midnite time slot. he paid thru his card. after which, we went to suntec to dine. hunny was in good spirits though cos he was off yesterday and came back to his office for a couple of hours to clear some unfinished stuff. he was rejuvenated....what more, we had dinner at marche suntec. he had 2 tall glasses of erdinger (0.5l) and that made his week....he said he had waited a week for that. cooling and re-energising. i ordered pizza while he got the jumbo cheese sausage...for dessert, i had movenpick swiss choc ice-cream as i had been CRAVING for nice ice-cream to perk me up after a long hectic week at work....i was satisfied with the pizza, grapeade snapple and the movenpick....mmmm.....yummmmyyy....

then we went to the game arcade and hunny changed $10 worth of coins and after that my turn...we had fun at the 'my sweet land' corner and got lots of candies and gummies...such a kid in us...really cute...actually hunny was kinda high at that moment. so we played till midnite.

we headed back to marina to catch the movie. he was very warm and held me in his arms throughout the movie though in between he 'napped' a little....he was tired i understood...

so after movies, he wanted to go to mustafa. it was already 2.45am or rather close to 3. we took a cab down and hunny was still very perky after splashing water on his face. he wanted to spend as much time as possibble while we still have he chance. so wen we got there...he was even more active than ever...joking around and managed to make me laugh my tired laugh...

he was such a sweetheart...we had a fun seven hours nite out....

he gave me the cab fare home...i got to my bed at 5am...sunday morning....he asked me to turn in as soon as i get home..n texted me..."nite sweetie...rest...sleep, u r working...luv u..." ooohh....nuthing beats his nice and short message at that point of time...5am in the morning...

//...counting down the days...//

5th day missing each other

2006-07-20T23:03:00.000+08:00

*yet another management meeting

today's another bombarding session..but yea, a constructive one too...i had been in this management meeting for the 3rd time now? i suppose if things were slowed down, then i will have to step in to try become the next pro-active leader with my best abilities that i possess now. i cannot fall short as the expectations are getting higher now...

i wish i can be in sharon's shoes...

but yea, i gotta work for it...no free rides...

*counting down the days

next is to count down the days to hunny's birthday? we will be meetin the day before just to make sure i get to give him the birthday kiss on the midnite of 29th july. then following day is the special event for us both...well, not actually an event cos i won't bother with all the typical customary session. i just know that we go through 'it' cos we are ready and this is the time to make the arrangements and parent's meeting will determine our confirmed date that we want to set it....ahsiao suggested 070707? mmm...sounds pretty good...but nah......maybe not.....maybe on our 13th anniversary? 010208? dunno...we shall see....it's all up to me and my planning..

*exhausted...drained...committed...

i guess hunny is gettin the hang of this event productions business...he has been so accommodative with his boss and very level headed as he had admitted himself...all cos he luvs the job, he luvs me and his parents....nuthing else matter as long as he has the intention to stay and make our future happen...

being the 'new' person that he is now, i am absolutely glad we have stayed together this far. i can sense that he's exhausted having to work 13 to 15 hours everyday as they are totally understaff at this moment....but he says its all worth it, every single bit of the efforts he's put in ......hunny says he has it all now, everything with the luv and support from me and his parents, it keeps him going and motivated...not that he is not motivated at work, but the long hours could tire him sooner or later...i mean anyone would just get burned out. anyone at all...its all up to individuals to manage their own stress and time...

*no 9

that is my 3rd finger size...im all excited and nervous at the same time...

//...meeting hunny in the morning and then lunchie with him at his workplace...//

we've been busy

2006-07-19T23:38:00.000+08:00

hunny and i have been workin long hours this week especially hunny...he has been going back home around midnite lately and they have to work on many projects...and being understaff...he is the main person his boss is relying on now.

i was watching 'project runway' and suddenly i fell in luv with daniel vosovic's outfit....all the designers competing did a garden party dress out of plants and flowers. his was with the most colours and very wearable indeed apart from chloe's...very whimsical and cute...well, he's cute too...and sensitive to others' feelings, very matured and meticulous in detailing...

i think daniel designs the best outfits for many challenges...besides santino and chloe...he has unique style but yet sophisticated...santino is unique all the way but not very practical sometimes...chloe has simple taste and wearable designs and not over the top. well, i its a matter of a few more episodes before the fashion week challenge. can't wait....he has got the immunity for the next challenge...

//...have been very busy...the both of us...he misses me as much as i miss him...//

i was not aware

2006-07-19T01:20:00.000+08:00

my chinese sis, joce was updating her blog...i didn't read it till about 12.50am. after i msn her to say that 'leceh' is troublesome for malay, not 'lecih' as she wrote on sunday.

however, i hadn't read the most updated one and she msn me bk that she had done the updating. so i read it...and much to my regrets, her uncle passed away. i was shocked...i know she must have felt so devastated to lose someone so dear...to cry over his death when she did not really get a chance to meet him or talk to him so often and all of a sudden he left the family.

i was nearing to shed tears and i could imagine how i would have felt if it happened to my family. my dad had a heart relapse before...i thought it could cost him his life...but thank god he went for surgery and his heart is back to normal...gotta watch his diet though.

so, to joce, i am terribly sorry for all the unforseen sadness in ur family while u guys were celebratin ur bro's 21st birthday...it really was a sudden news that u guys had to face...it hurts but it happened....i know u have a great heart...things will turn out fine for you, i hope for the best of ur family. luv within ur family will make u stronger to go thru this path of life...i've been there, sheddin for a family member whom i hadn't really got in touch with for so long...we will only feel the loss when they are gone....but we will get over it...no matter how long it's gonna take us...

//...i suppose life would become null without luv...//

did a useful conclusion

2006-07-18T23:10:00.000+08:00

finally i did a conclusion for april's roster with all the updated leaves and hours. i did a thorough check on all the staff timecards. *pheewww! what a relief! i had to clean up all my backlog and continue with my SOP and organising the areas that need my attention...

//...its a very fulfilling day at work...//

luv is all around

2006-07-17T23:58:00.000+08:00

its gonna b a special day for both of us...

hunny asked me.."isn't it cool to talk about the things we've never talked about before?"

the wait was worth it afterall.......

//...i did made a vow i am gonna get hitched at the age of 30...so here we go...//

no movies again...

2006-07-16T01:07:00.000+08:00

just got home, like half an hour ago. hun dropped me off at my block and he continued with the cab back home....

he fetched me from work after leaving his office at about 7plus. we wanted to have dinner...away from orchard. so we took the train to cityhall instead of the bus as there was a traffic congestion along orchard road. took the stuttle service ot millenia walk. dropped off and browsed around harvey norman. it was a very warm environment. we went to the electronics department...saw the latest gadgets on the market...mobile phones, pc notebooks and others....

then we walked to suntec and had dinner at the japanese restaurant 'beppu menkan'. it's the one he wanted to go last week but we ended up dining regretfully at 'just noodles'. he was craving for those ramen for ages....finally when he got to eat it, he needed to come back for the extra chillies option...they gives us choice of adding '1', '2', '4', ' 6' or '8' chillies to the ramen we ordered. so far hunny just did '4'. the chillies was nuthing now compared to when he first tasted the spiciness....so the next trip is gonna be '6'. crazy...as much as i luv my food real spicy, i dun wanna kill the taste of the the 'unagi' ramen that i ordered...so i did '2' just like the time when i did my chicken ramen.

hunny was rather satisfied and beaming especially when he had his booze to compliment. after dinner, we headed to the cinema. sadly, the show we wanted to watch 'pirates of the caribbean' was sold out..and scary movie 4 was no longer showing there. dissappointed as we were, we just walked to the beach road theatre. and as i anticipated, they do not have the time slot we wanted. so we decided to go to the bugis one. that too, was sold out for the 11.25 show. the next time slot was 12.25am and we thought it would be a little too late. so we decided to just head home....hunny fetched me home and there we were on bus 190, listening to his chillout song collections from the ipod. i was having migraines every now and then.

so it was at the right time, but i was disappointed we did not get to watch movies the second time we planned to. then i messaged hunny when he was on the cab home that we could have watched it even if its late anyway....but then we ended up arguin. i was thinking out loud...maybe it was my mood swing. i should have just kept my mouth shut.

but things are ok now...it was just a minor issue...i was just being a 'baby' today....

//...i guess i was feeling tired and wanted his attention...//

*wedding planner

2006-07-13T23:11:00.000+08:00

i am gonna be the wedding planner of our own wedding.....soon enough we are each other's life partner.....for eternity...

went out alone today as hunny finished work late...i was in my miss sixty jeans and printed tunique with under layered lace orange top i bought both from bangkok that looked somehow casual and feminine but yet sophisticated with my pony hair orange belt i bought from my boutique.....chic...
i was shopping around to check for the exact size n measurement for my 3rd finger. went to tiffany & co. it was really cosy...i saw a brilliant *wedding band...did not try though...just window shop...i will come again when hunny is around for his opinions...cos he's gonna be the one gettin for me....

then i went to Armani Exchange. there was a sale. i saw this *GORGEOUS little princess dress...hunny showed me the last time...so i tried it on and its really *gorgeous on me too. i really like it.....even if its $369....i will come again with hunny to see if he could purchase it for me? maybe one of my b'day pressie? then i looked around further...tried this little white knitted zippered with press studs sweater...very stylish, very versatile, i could wear it sporty or feminine. its got many ways to dress it up or dress it down....i got the right choice...its $239 before less...sale price is $167...i thought it was worth it for an armani sweater...and its got more mileage than any other ordinary sweaters...cool...whitey...snowy...i was pleased...

then i got myself a pair of shoes for work...it was a good pair too...cos i need to get one nice pair to dress up more professionally now that i have to face the MEDIA more these days...

later around 9.30 i felt tired and a little guilty for shopping...but what the heck! i feel good...that's all that matters...an hour later hunny messaged me to say he's about to go home...by then i was already home...told him about tiffany...

//...so it's just 'around the corner'...//

*the band of luv....

2006-07-13T14:44:00.000+08:00

when i knocked off at about 9.30pm, hunny texted..."what's your 3rd finger ring size hunny?" mmm...i guess its the smallest size...then i questioned him why...then later i knew what the reason was...

i had seen it coming. but didn't know it's gonna be on hunny's birthday. it's kind of like a nice surprise for me....mmm...on hunny's birthday...it's a nice gift for him too....
i was enthused....butterflies were growing in my stomach rapidly....it was exciting...the anticipation was that we are planning our own dates for the special day, until we are totally ready...but this was just a token of his luv for me...a real nice token....

it was turning my whole world around....i was floating in the clouds.....my heart was thumping louder and faster....

a new chapter in the story of my life...our lives...

hun texted me again...
"are u excited luv? we are finally reachin there. its been so long..."

*the band of luv

//...the happiest moment in our lives ...//

::

::

::

lookin japanese

2006-07-12T00:28:00.000+08:00

i had a bad day at work...so did hunny. niza and i had to sit down with the bosses to discuss the SOP (standard operating procedures) for the whole infrastructure of our organization. it was uncalled for. we were not prepared and didn't get enough time to prepare. so we were stressed up. had no appetite to eat...so did niza but she ate anyway, at 6pm. while i prepared 3 types of SOPs (R/G, Merchandise On Loan and Staff Purchase) as i am in charge of inventory.....wherever i could possibly type and print. it was already in my mind; just to put them together and get it printed out. So, i had to hand over the customers' database to my boss as he volunteered to take it over from me for awhile as he knows i had too much things on hand already. the HR reports are already killing me....

well, that's work....the higher we climb, the more responsibilities come with it. hunny had a hard time at work too. with people talking behind his back....they are obviously envious of him being the favourite of his boss....

so we both ended work late...9.15pm. hunny wanted very much to meet me....badly. so he asked to meet at bencoolen as he had to set up the event hall at suntec, so it was just nearby for us. so i reached there first and waited for my other half outside the 'kopitiam'. after 10minutes of waiting, i saw a cute figure walking towards the traffic light...

he was in 'my' japanese orange shirt and his diesel jeans and puma suede shoes and carryin the japanese porter bag on one hand and the laptop on the other. he is looking so fucking japanese! cute, i adore him....he turned heads....very very jap looking and professional....

so when he got near me, he greeted 'koni-chiwa'...as in 'good evening' in japanese. with his cute wide smile and pearly white teeth....then he kissed me. it felt really nice...everything that was bad that happened at work, has been forgotten.....then we went in to have our meal...that was my first meal of the day...at 10pm..can u imagine? hunny had to energise himself up as he was feeling lethargic after a long day at work too. so he ordered a booze. he was still cracking silly jokes despite being tired the whole day....and he admitted that i have fucking good taste for being his personal shopper in this case...people have been asking him where he got that orange shirt from. i really take pride in whatever i do, thus making others look good gives me the satisfaction too...so we ate, and laughed and talked and laughed...

we left bencoolen at 11pm and walked to stamford court bus stop. as usual he still cracks jokes and brought joy to my soul......then as we waited for my bus, he made a remark that we hadn't been 'intimate' for quite some time. yea, i missed that too. but both of us are so busy....and so tired...hunny wants to go on a holiday with me next month...my birthday month! yay!!! i'd luv that...then we shall further discuss the details when the time comes. so when my bus was apporaching, he gave me a long kiss and held me tight in his arms as if he never wanna let go and whispering 'mmmm....i miss u soooo much' into my ears....then he kissed me again.

i almost cried.....upon gettin a seat on the bus, i texted him..."i luv u hunny...my batt runnin low"

then he replied.."luv u more sweetie...text me when u get home"

aaawww......i was in cloud nine....

mmmuuussshhhyyy............(*wink)....puke if u must.....for all i care!

ciao....

//...looking forward to meetin hunny again to catch 'pirates of the caribbean'...//

i am indifferent....it's my prerogative...

2006-07-10T21:51:00.000+08:00

mmm...anonymous with "gerl! ape jeer, over kan kao!" sentence....its been repeated with the word 'over' like wat, 3 times since june 29th? mmm....keeps me wondering...is my blog really that interesting...do i sound aggressive to the extent of affecting others? i mean, the sentence that this 'anonymous follower' of my blog said i should use my abilities gifted by HIM not for my own interests only....as he/she knows i am a smart person...well, as i have mentioned my vision is similar to that of karim rashid's...read on...

...just in case u dun remember, these are the extracted lines....

"My real desire is to see people live in the modus of our time, to participate in the contemporary world, and to release themselves from nostalgia, antiquated traditions, old rituals, kitsch and the meaningless. We should be conscious and attune with this world in this moment. If human nature is to live in the past - to change the world is to change human nature."

that's my vision here....i would luv to impart my knowledge to those people who lack in fashion & style education....however, if they have too much ignorance and arrogance within themselves and refuse to acknowledge them, i can't help it. just remind ourselves that we are living in the fast pace environment and gotta keep up with time....that is the only way to keep yourself afloat in this vicious world.

and how do u do that? braoden your horizons, and keep educating yourself...its true, that GOD is watching over us but we gotta be independent, ask stupid questions in order to become smart ourselves....scheme to improve lives, plan for the future....one instance, if u were to be in foreign land or some places very isolated without any familiar signs, if u are not street smart, u will not be able to survive, not able to get anywhere.....u will still be afraid to move forward and get stucked in your very own comfort zone. it is really the mind-sets of some shallow individuals...keep the faith in yourself and just do not be afraid to make mistakes and recognise those mistakes then learn from them.

some people who are not widening up their scope of minds are those who will lose out in life, trust me, it's the truth...like those who are nonchalant towards the daily affairs or politics and just do nothing about things that have been going in the wrong directions......we mature gradually, physically and mentally. there are more to life than just technology...or earning money or having a family or even just being fashionable. i know as a human being, i am not a perfect person too...as i have always been emphasizing but, i do criticise constructively, for the betterment of my fellow beings...

while i can accept criticisms with grace, too....pick myself up again, reflect on myself and keep progressing with my life....continue motivating myself with the healthy self-esteem...penetrate myself through the vicious world and conscientiously pick up details to learn from what is wrong and make them right. we are liable for our own mistakes, no matter who we are.

i could see that already some people are losing out on things that are needing their attentions....search within yourselves, my fellow people...be pro-active. look around you. open your eyes and realise that we must be able to improve ourselves, in any way at all...take one step at a time.....start from scratch...at least when you fall, u will be able to pick yourself up again.. no one will be there for you is you do not help yoursleves..

one day u will realise that i have made a great point here...TOTALLY...

this is my journal....my views...my perspectives in life....

i had meant to keep this blog a personal online journal...but i have found some use to it now...

....enjoy, people!!!...

//...will still keep on going...with my wonderful and luvly life...tschuess...//

to all 'minahs' & 'ah lians' out there

2006-07-10T02:51:00.000+08:00

how many of u know who the leading figure in the fields of product, interior design, fashion, furniture, lighting and art is? and how many of u comprehend the meaning of style? if u still do not understand what or who i am talking about....try asking yourself....'do i know who karim rashid is?' let me introduce....he is my idol, my inspiration right from the very beginning when i just started finding myself fluent and having the flair in fashion & style, many years ago.......

to me, style is not only about wearing nice attire or having nice mobile phones. it's basically all in the mind and the eyes of an innovative soul. karim rashid has designed for everything that deserves to be radically distinctive....contemporary.....avant-garde....

issey miyake, prada, giorgio armani, yahoo! USA or even hun's & my favourite dining place NOOCH is being designed by him. and many others....like georg jensen and even saks. yea, if u ignorant people must know.....style & fashion is diversified....it's true that it has no boundaries to style but there is always a focus to be different...may i repeat...DIFFERENT.

"When money tries to buy beauty it tends to purchase a kind of courteous kitsch" William H. Gass.

"My real desire is to see people live in the modus of our time, to participate in the contemporary world, and to release themselves from nostalgia, antiquated traditions, old rituals, kitsch and the meaningless. We should be conscious and attune with this world in this moment. If human nature is to live in the past - to change the world is to change human nature." .
Karim Rashid
He has exactly the same vision as i have; only difference is mine more to the image and appearance of oneself but i could so relate to his message very well....
if u (the 'abovementioned') are still not savvy enough to digest what all my 'emphasis' on this blog is all about....all i can say is...

my 'condolences' to u all; what a shame!....

those who totally understand me, like eza and nazya would probably give me an applaud for stepping up the minds of the mundane & passe asian culture....who are still so hung up with the past. high time to move on people!!!

anyways, back to karim rashid....just check out his innovative creations...remarkably magnificent....spectacular & conspicuous....distinctively pleasing to the eyes...

if what i say here is not enough to convince u dense, obtuse people, go check out his website.

www.karimrashid.com

everything is really of aesthetic designs...nothing excluded...

well, he is the man of style......my idol, my inspiration....

//...be unusual, create ur own identity, make a difference...//

rest day for him

2006-07-09T22:18:00.000+08:00

hunny was on the xbox the whole day, still trying to wind down....so we did not hook up today. i knocked off at 8.30 pm as there was a couple of things i needed to hand over to my fellow supervisor as i would be off tomorrow. sometimes if i wasn't around things would either go missing or being messed up. so i gotta remind the staff to be more alert..especially when it comes to the important stuff like the 'birthday list' of our clientele.

i am responsible for any inventory, administrative stuff or HR related. with all the trust my bosses had given me, i feel the more pressure to live up to their expectations...since they have recognized my abilities even more up to this level, i am pushing myself to perform even better as the management personnel....

sure, i would be judged on how i gain respect from the staff which i already earned before this...most of them do look up to me. but being the youngest member of the management team apart from sharon, i have to prove that i could be better than the more senior supervisors.

now i gotta do up a proposal to improve the inventory system and be the more knowledgeable person in the company in filemaker than i already am...my boss depends on me...another pressure....but they keep me on my toes....i do not regret being in this great line of career. the bosses see me as one of the pillars of the company who will become the leader and achieve great goals in life. i have learnt alot and now am still learning from the upper management.

my family is proud of me too...i did not dissappoint them in any way for working so hard and sometimes even neglect them subconsciously. this is what i wanna do...be the best that i could become....contribute to the well being of the company and thus, my family.

//...i am hunny's motivation and also the driver to work hard in life...//

hunny surprised me again....

2006-07-09T12:44:00.000+08:00

yesterday hunny & his company co-ordinated an event at sentosa...Raoul launch by the beach. started very early at 7.30am...the nite before he had to go home very late around 2am. that means he had less than 5 hours to sleep. however, he still wanted to fetch me up from work last nite even when he was very tired and complained of needing a massage. i really adore my hunny...the way he pampers me...he knew i would luv to meet him every now and then especially on weekends when he is supposed to be off....so we met at 8pm after i knocked off. he was in his quads and his weekend black tee and the puma white shoes. i thought he would be in jeans or at least his cargo pants. but he said, he was very sticky after a long day in the sun.

then we headed to suntec for our dinner. he was craving for the japanese noodles where we had the last time we watched movies there. so we walked and talked. upon reaching there, we saw this place called 'just noodles' where the posters look really appealing to us. so we tried there instead. hunny had the prawn noodles set and soft shell crabs while i had only chawamushi and i could share the soft shell crabs with hun. the bill was $18. hunny foot the bill. it wasn't a fantastic dinner and hunny and i regretted for eating there. we should have gone to the japanese restaurant opposite pizza hut instead. it was not saisfying for hunny and sure was disappointing for me.

so, we walked around suntec...to carrefour, to eng wah movie theatre; thinking of watching scary movie 4 but there wasn't any nite time slot, to the game arcade called 'my star factory'. we saw a group of people crowding around the "my sweet land" game booth where they collect sweets and snacks from that game booth. crazy....we thought. so we looked around and spent some 'noisy time' in the arcade. hunny wanted to get some disney characters that i luv from the 'toy soldiers', 'winnie the pooh' and some others ...so he changed some coins....after a few failed attempts...he gave up.

later as we walked further,there was this booth machine called 'happy lifter' where arcade patrons could win themselves mobile phones, psp (playstation portable), discmans and many other electronic gadgets. it wasn't as easy as it seems. then hunny wanted to try his luck...he was aiming the nokia n70 or the moto razr v3x. we spent one and a half hour there just to get it right to lift the gifts to drop them and for him to collect from the machine. he didn't give up until the arcade had to close and we were left with no more coins. eventually, he tried to amuse me by collecting the candies from the "my sweet land" machine. he was having fun with that...the last 2 or 3 coins were 'worth' the candies...at least we didn't leave the arcade empty-handed, he said. we needed to destress and that was one way....spending time together in the game arcade....

so, it was midnite and we strolled along suntec then to north bridge road...he seemed really beat as he held me in his arms...i gave him a warm sweet kiss...he smiled and reciprocated...then after a long walk under 'the moon and the stars' he hailed a cab for me to head back home. while he could still catch the bus.

it wasn't a bad evening though we didn't get to watch movies...but the 4 hours was a quality time spent i must say. we have learnt our lesson, not to patronise the 'just noodles' restaurant or cafe or whatever you call it. anyhow, we would meet again tonite i suppose cos hunny is really getting worn out with the upcoming events with just the minimum staffing in the company...so he may need me to seek some comfort and relax together...

//...this month there is a fair balance of ups and downs...//

oh, well..another bloghopper...

2006-07-08T01:26:00.000+08:00

2 hours ago a boghopper commented..."Happened to chance upon your blog.. I can't help it but felt that you include the same sentences in ALL your entries. Either "I have an tasteful eye", "I'm good in fashion", "I'm gorgeous". It's totally disgusting you know...."

this person said, in ALL entries...check out the word 'ALL'...apparently this person is either envious of me or just have a low self-esteem....obviously this person did not not read ALL entries...and i suppose did not even understand that i have the right to write whatever i want to cos its my blog and its my journal....does this person even have one? or he/she does not have a life? get over yourself!!!....

even said "felt that you include the same sentences in ALL your entries." what kind of english sentence is that? u mean u felt i include the same sentences? its not based on facts, but based on ur feelings? goodness gracious! c'mon, u immature ppl! think!......but its my blog, i will not bother too much. if i feel good about myself, i will still "disgust" u ppl........(*wink)...

do not bother to continue reading if u are nauseated by my entries...if u keep reading that shows that my blog really interest u...am i not right?

i really think u shallow-minded low self-esteem ppl should get over yourselves and rate others based on facts.......they are still living under their shelves and could not accept the fact that other ppl are feeling good about themselves....u feel inferior? that's ur *cufking* problem...

"and a healthy self-esteem is a great quality compared to those people who have their many insecurities and a chip on the shoulder as usually, with this in hand, they treat people vehemently, and with great malice or live life blaming others, and many other typical character traits that comes along with low self-esteem....and that is not what we want to become"
these sentences really make sense. to whoever who is smart enough, u will agree totally. cos like i said, nobody's perfect...but if u recognise those imperfections within urselves and overcome them with your best ability to gain your own confidence, u won't have the inferiority complex like the person who wrote the above comments, feeling disgusted by my healthy self-esteem.....

//...isn't it great to have ur own journal and to know that people are interested to know about ur life?...//